Follow Your Star
by rosewarren
Summary: post-Doomsday. Rose in Pete's world, waiting for something. Or someone.
1. Chapter 1

**Well I woke up today, and you're on the other side**

_Once upon a time there was a girl named Rose who met a man who could change his face. He took her away from home in his magical machine and showed her the whole of time and space. They thought it would never end. _

_And then one day the man, who was the lord of time, faced his foes and saved the world. He did not do it alone. He was not the one to save himself._

_Bad Wolf came._

_There was a song, and Bad Wolf saw all that is, all that was, all that ever could be. The foes were defeated and the man was safe. When the singing stopped, Bad Wolf turned into Rose, and Rose turned into a girl who said forever but couldn't keep her promise._

_Once there was a woman named Rose who loved a man with no name but the one he gave himself. They thought they had forever but their time came to an end, as all things must do. _

_She was left alone. The man and his magical machine were gone. _

_But the song remained._

* * *

Sometimes Rose thought deja vu surely meant something else. Events would happen that the world found shocking, and she only shrugged as if it was old news.

Other times something small would occur, and it would be _wrong_. She could not explain it, but she knew that what happened ought _not _to have happened.

Sometimes at night her dreams were so vivid that she would wake up, expecting them to continue. The thread of the dream always vanished, leaving her to worry about things undone, events gone wrong.

She never tried to explain these things, because it always left her feeling foolish. So she went about the business of living, pretending that a dream was only a dream, and her real life was right in front of her.

That was harder than it should be, some days.

* * *

Rose wakes with a start. Sitting up in bed, she looks around the darkroom, searching. Searching for something that's not here. She sighs. Several times now in the past few months she's woken up listening to something, listening _for_ something, but the sound never remains. She doesn't know whether to blame an overactive imagination or the volume on a nearby radio.

Lying back in her bed, she tries to remember what woke her up. If she was dreaming, she can't remember it. If her mother was watching television, it's no longer too loud.

Sometimes Rose thinks it's a shame she doesn't believe in ghosts or haunted houses. At least that would explain it.

Looking at the clock, she notes that it's almost time to get up. Ignoring the odd sensation that telling time always seems to give her, she turns off her alarm before it can start to ring and throws back the covers. Blinking in the darkness, she mentally calculates her time here.

182 days and counting. 182 days since she came to this world. She doesn't know why she continues to keep track, she simply does it. Getting up, she walks to her bathroom in the dark. Turning the light on and washing her face in the sink, her gaze wanders over the countertop. Bottles of lotion, perfume, makeup are scattered around the sink. Her toothbrush sits inside a bright yellow cup.

Once in a while she'll reach for an item that's not there, a bracelet or a small trinket. Her things didn't come with her, not here. They left everything behind. That doesn't stop the impression that her things are someplace else, that there is a place she left behind that she really ought to get back to. That something is waiting for her, if she can just get back to it.

There is no place, of course, just their old council flat that's probably in ruins by now, but there you are. Just another oddity about this place.

As she washes her hair in the shower she goes over her schedule for the day. Breakfast. Work. Home.

Yup, she thinks to herself. Right on schedule there.

She dresses in black trousers and a plain white t-shirt. She dries her hair into its usual shape and thinks about getting a haircut. Does her makeup and slips on new boots - black leather, 2-inch heel, far too expensive - and a black leather jacket. She's out the door before she remembers her watch. She grabs her silver hoop earrings on the way back.

She can already hear signs of life downstairs. Her heels click on the stairs. By the time she reaches the dining room the disorientation she felt that morning is gone and forgotten.

"Good morning, sweetheart," Jackie greets her.

"Mornin', Mum," Rose says, sitting down at her usual place. They're in the casual dining room. They never eat in the kitchen, and the formal dining room is reserved for parties. A far cry from how she grew up, but Rose is very good at adapting to new situations. Jackie, of course, has taken to it enthusiastically.

"How do you feel?" Rose asks.

Jackie makes a face. "Had a hard time sleeping. I tossed and turned all night. Drove your poor father mad, I'm afraid."

"You should take it easy today."

"Oh, Rose, I'm fine." Jackie pours Rose some juice.

"I know. Still." Rose takes the glass and tries the juice. Orange.

A maid appears at the table, setting down a platter of eggs and sliced ham. It's followed by a bowl of fruit and cereal in crystal serving dishes. Rose can't help but be privately amused at this. They didn't start this ritual - Pete's first wife did - but Jackie has been reluctant to change too many things too soon. Rose doesn't think Pete would even notice, but he might notice if they started eating Jackie's cooking in the kitchen each morning.

Especially her coffee.

"Thank you, Marie," Jackie says, taking the serving fork and putting a healthy amount of eggs on Rose's plate.

"You need this more than I do," Rose says in amusement as Marie vanishes back into the kitchen.

"You need to eat," Jackie responds. "Last thing I need is more weight." She adds some fresh fruit to Rose's plate, knowing that her daughter will never eat all that.

"Good morning." Pete says.

"Morning." Rose is still unsure of her place here, still unsure whether to call him Pete or Dad. She calls him both, depending on her mood and his, and whether they're in public or not. He seems to have accepted a full-grown daughter as best as any man could, and has been very kind to her.

"You were up all night, Jackie. You need to eat and go back to bed."

"I'm fine," Jackie assures him.

"At least promise me you'll put your feet up later."

"I promise," Jackie promises.

Rose watches her mother covertly as she pours some milk into a bowl of cereal. Jackie is nearly 41, and she's four months pregnant. The shock of finding her dead husband alive, albeit on a parallel world, and being rescued to said world to avoid being killed by aliens, was enough of a shock to her system. A pregnancy was unplanned but welcomed, but this time around carrying a baby is a bit harder. Jackie does a lot of resting during the day.

"I have a new name," Jackie says, and Pete and Rose both groan.

"What?" Jackie demands.

"No more names, Jackie. Please," Pete begs.

"Tristan," Jackie continues.

"Oh, Mum."

"Alastair, then."

"Alastair," Pete repeats. "Come on, Jacks."

"If Rose was a boy we were going to call her Alastair." Jackie doesn't mean that she and Pete - _this_ Pete- were going to name her Alastair. She means the Pete she lost. A small thing, not even awkward anymore. All three of them are adjusting to life on this new world, adjusting to living as a family. It's what Rose has wanted her entire life, and she's so grateful to have this chance again.

"Thanks heavens I was a girl," Rose says humorously.

Pete shakes his head. "Not Alastair, Jackie."

"How'm I supposed to name this baby if you two constantly tell me what rubbish my names are?" Jackie demands.

"Pick something that's not rubbish," Pete suggests. He is thrilled to be having a baby and it shows in every way, from the way he dotes on Jackie to the free reign he's given them in decorating the nursery.

"Oh, I'll try," Jackie grumbles.

"Speaking of the baby," Rose says before Pete can answer, "just so this poor baby can be legitimate and official and all, are you two going to get married sometime?"

Jackie and Pete stare at each other. To the world they're already married, have been for over twenty years. When Pete found them and brought them back to this world, just before the Cybermen destroyed the London they'd lived in, he'd been able to pass Jackie off as his late wife. He was from the parallel world and had lost his wife to Cybermen several years before, and it was fairly painless to announce that she hadn't been dead after all, merely in hiding with a head injury.

A full-grown daughter was something else, and the wealthiest man in Great Britain isn't allowed much privacy. Rose is getting used to the attention focused on her and tries to ignore it as much as possible.

"Are we married?" Jackie asks hesitantly.

Pete seems to consider this. "We didn't marry each other, technically."

"But we have the paperwork that says we did."

"We'll renew our vows," he tells her. "Before the baby comes. Right here at the house."

"That'll be lovely!" Rose says enthusiastically.

Jackie is blushing. "I'd like that."

Pete gets to his feet and kisses her. "Have a rest this morning. Then start planning the party."

Rose gives her mum a quick kiss on the cheek. "I'll help you tonight, if you like."

"I would. Have a good day!" Jackie calls after them.

"You, too. Bye!"

* * *

Pete drives them in to Torchwood. Three years after the Cybermen invasion nearly destroyed the building, it is rebuilt and fully functioning. Officially part of the government, Pete runs it with relatively little interference from higher-ranking officials. His success at foiling the first Cybermen invasion helps with that. He takes his mission very seriously, and so far they've had success in dealing with aliens and using alien technology to defend the Earth.

"I've got a meeting this morning," Pete says as he and Rose enter the building. "Will you need a ride home?"

"Don't be silly," she tells him. "I'll be fine."

"Your mum will blame me if you're late for dinner."

Rose laughs. "I've been much later than that before."

Pete looks at her questioningly, and Rose finds herself momentarily confused. "I mean, I've been home late lots of times before," she clarifies.

Pete nods. "See you later, then."

Rose walks down to her office. As a Torchwood field agent she shares a room with the rest of her team. The office is on the seventh floor, which suits her perfectly. Office on seven, cafeteria on five. Pete's office is higher up, and she's been there exactly once. Rose doesn't have a fear of heights, and she's no stranger to an elevator, but she has a strong aversion to the thought of visiting the higher floors at Torchwood Tower.

Mickey and Jake are already there. She smiles at Mickey. Whatever relationship they'd had ended long ago, but they're still good friends. Jake Simmonds is the first friend Mickey made when he crossed to this world, and they've proven to be a good team and good trainers for Rose.

"What's new?" Rose asks, settling in on a chair next to Jake.

Mickey rolls his eyes. "Nothin' new so far. Quiet couple of weeks, ain't it?"

"Quiet is a good thing," Jake disagrees. "No sense in asking aliens to come on by when they're going to get here eventually."

"At least it'd give us a reason to go to work."

Rose shakes her head. "I hate sitting around doing nothing. Seems to me that I'd be better off working in a shop again."

"You're better than that," Mickey tells her. "We always knew that."

"Too good for a shop, but all right to hunt down alien life forms?" she asks in amusement.

"You've done all right so far," Jake tells her.

Rose has been training at Torchwood almost since Pete brought her and Jackie back to this world. Faced with an adult daughter, Pete brought her on at Torchwood, hoping to avoid most of the tabloid speculations. He'd initially thought she could work at Vitex and take up the slack that his absence was causing, but her lack of schooling proved hard to overcome in the business world.

Rose prefers to work at Torchwood, although when she realized just what she was expected to do, she had second thoughts. Watching the havoc the Cybermen wreaked on her home world was enough to make her want to stay far away at first. The thought of fighting aliens on a regular basis was a bit frightening.

Jackie had more than a few second thoughts herself, and wasn't shy about voicing them. Pete convinced her it was safe enough, and Rose's natural curiosity won out. It was a good move for her.

"It's 'cause I've had good mentors," Rose tells Jake now.

He laughs back at her. "Thanks."

Rose grins. "I mean it." She's gone on several field operations and handled herself well against several aliens. She's amazed Pete and the other higher-ups with how well she's done, and truthfully, it surprised her, too. Growing up on the estate was hardly preparation for fighting aliens, but she's gotten very good at defending herself peacefully and figuring out what it is that aliens want with them.

And when all that doesn't work, it turns out that she's much better at running than she thought.

"What are we going to do, then, if there's no activity to follow up on?" Rose asks. "More paperwork?"

"Filing," Jake suggests.

"I'd rather go clean the floors," Mickey disagrees. "I've still got paper cuts from yesterday's filing."

They're saved from both filing and floor sweeping by the beeping on Jake's pager. He checks the display and grins at them.

"Aliens spotted. Let's go."


	2. Chapter 2

**Our time will never come again**

Another quiet day at Torchwood. Last week's alien sighting was so simple and straightforward that hardly any effort was involved. An alien craft was lost and needed directions home. Since then, there haven't been any other sightings. Nothing suspicious is going on. No threats to Great Britain, to Earth, or to the solar system. It's a bit of a drag, actually.

Rose catches herself as she thinks that last thought. How could any of this be a drag? This is the most excitement she's ever had in her life, and she's complaining because things are quiet at the moment? She shakes her head, recalling the chaos surrounding the Cybermen invasion of London. She and Jackie were scheduled to become one of those monsters, would have been Cyberized if Pete and Mickey hadn't arrived in time.

She is interrupted from her musings by her mobile phone.

"It's lunchtime," Mickey's voice says. "Come and eat."

Rose thinks for a brief moment. "Okay," she says. How can it be lunchtime already? The morning was dragging by so slowly she was convinced it would never end.

Rose meets Mickey in the cafeteria. "Where's Jake?" she asks.

"Had an appointment." Mickey doesn't elaborate, and Rose doesn't ask.

"What's good?" she asks him instead, looking over the selections.

"It's all good today," he assures her, and loads up his tray.

Rose follows him to the register with a tray that's not quite so full. Swiping their ID badges though the scanner, their accounts are automatically charged for the food. A tinny voice coming from the scanner reminds them that accounts are due in full next week.

The best thing about Torchwood, for Rose, is that while the rest of the world looks at her as a mystery, her coworkers simply accept her. Some are assuredly thinking that she's only there because she's Pete's daughter, but no one accuses her of that to her face. No one is trying to sneak into her office to get the latest scoop to sell to the tabloids. No one calls her a spoiled little rich girl. They're all just busy eating and talking, not noticing her at all.

It's nice.

She's happy on this world, but sometimes the fact that Pete is so successful here is hard to deal with. Rose tells herself that had her dad lived in her world, the same thing would have happened. He would have been just as successful, and she'd be in the same position. Rose tries to tell herself that. For some reason, maybe because her real dad died before she could remember him, it just doesn't ring true.

They take their trays outside to enjoy the nice weather. Few of the other tables are filled, most people choosing to eat inside or at their desks today.

"You doing all right?" Mickey asks her.

Rose looks up from her sandwich. "Yeah. Why?"

Mickey shrugs. "I dunno. It can be hard, coming over to a parallel world."

Rose laughs. "That is the truth, isn't it?" She pushes her hair away from her face and surveys their surroundings. They're in a small courtyard outside the cafeteria, overlooking part of London. "It's so much like home."

"That was the hardest thing when I first came," Mickey tells her. "Trying to fit in. Trying to be Rickey to my gran, trying to stay me when I wasn't with her. Pretending that this place was normal."

"It is normal, Mickey. It's just not our normal, yeah?"

"You mean a president instead of a prime minister and zeppelins flying around?"

Rose smiles. "Yeah. The president," she says suddenly, and then stops.

"What about her?" They've never met President Harriet Jones, but they're both aware that she has a small hand in Torchwood.

"She's...nothing." Rose shakes her head.

"It's something, isn't it, Rose?" he asks her. "Me and you off the old estate, flying through the universe to end up here."

"I know." Rose had never heard of parallel worlds before - neither had Mickey, of course. And then one day Jake came through to their world, dressed in black, carrying a gun, accompanied by others that he called the Preachers. He was from a different world, he claimed, and they were under attack. Using technology stolen from the company who was causing the attack, he and his Preachers had found another world and come to ask for help.

Mickey had gone with them, over both Rose and Jackie's protests. His parallel world counterpart was part of the Preachers, and he'd been killed. Mickey considered it his duty to take his place and try to help. They hadn't seen him for nearly a year. Rose had tried to think of him as gone for good, had tried to accept that maybe something had happened to him.

And then one day her dad came home. Only it wasn't her dad, it was a Pete Tyler who wasn't _her_ Pete Tyler. A Pete Tyler who'd been brought by Mickey. The Cybermen who'd nearly destroyed his world had escaped from Pete's Torchwood, which was an organization meant to track down aliens and use their technology. The Cybermen had escaped to the world that Rose and Jackie were living on. Pete and Mickey and Jake had arrived just in time, and Pete had all but forced them to come home with him.

Jackie had resisted - fears of the Cybermen and husbands coming back from the dead had almost undone her. Rose, glad to see Mickey, stunned to see her dad, had agreed a little more easily. The fact that the Cybermen were so close had helped. The Cybermen were defeated that day, and Pete brought them home with him to start over as a proper family.

"All those years, just sitting there," Rose says. "Imagining what we'd do one day. We never imagined this, did we?"

"Don't have the imagination for it," Mickey shakes his head.

"What were we wasting our time with?" she asks with a grin.

"Hey, there."

Rose and Mickey both look up. A man in a brown suit is standing there, tall and with brown hair that's a shade too long.

"Hello." Rose tries not to smile too much. It's hard to do.

Mickey nods.

"Gareth Rogers," the man supplies helpfully. "From Accounting."

"Accounting," Mickey echoes, nodding his head. "Yeah, of course."

"Shut it," Rose tells him good-naturedly. "Would you like to sit with us?" she asks.

"Love it." Gareth sits down beside Rose, setting down a tray that is considerably less full than Mickey's own.

Mickey sees this and is clearly unimpressed. Rose glares at him until he clears his throat.

"I'm gonna go get a refill," he says. "See you later."

Gareth takes a look at Mickey's tray, clearly disbelieving his need for a refill of anything. But he nods as Mickey takes his leave.

"Haven't seen you around recently," Gareth says.

Rose tries very hard not to blush. "No, I, I haven't had any expenses to report lately."

"No excitement lately?"

She all but giggles in response. "No. Not lately." What is wrong with her? Why is she acting like a teenager? Rose would kick herself if she could.

"We've had a lot of drama in our department. Some kind of pest infestation."

Rose nods, not daring to open her mouth just yet.

"We thought it might be some alien race coming to take over the world, but it turns out it was just silverfish."

"Maybe they were going to take over the world by eating all our files," Rose suggests, and is pleased without end when he laughs.

Gareth takes a sip of his drink and clears his throat. "Rose..."

"Yes?" she asks, holding her breath.

"I enjoyed our date last summer."

"Oh, me too!" she assures him.

"Did you?" he asks doubtfully. "Because you never returned my calls after that."

She frowns. "I don't remember you calling me."

"Or emailing?"

"No." She shakes her head. "I would have remembered." Of course she would have. She has an insane crush on this man. Although...she can barely remember the date he's talking about, although she knows they did go somewhere together.

"I thought you were just avoiding me. I tried avoiding you, too, but I got a bit tired of that."

"Oh, I'm glad." Something isn't ringing true in her actions, and Rose tries to make up for it now. "I wasn't avoiding you. I'm sorry - we had some things going on at home."

"Is it because you just got reunited with your parents? I understand if you need some space." He clearly doesn't understand that, because the intense looks he's giving her are saying something else.

"No, oh no. My mum is having a baby," Rose tells him. "It's not a secret, but we're not going out of our way to tell people yet. She's not been feeling well."

"Oh. Okay." He takes another sip of his drink. The sun hits his head and Rose admires the way his brown hair is lit by the sunshine.

"Maybe sometime we could try again," she suggests hesitantly.

He looks at her over his glass. "Try again?" he asks slowly.

"A movie? Or dinner somewhere?" Rose feels like she's on the edge of a cliff and is about to step off without a parachute.

He smiles at her, a happy, open grin, and Rose feels herself fall.

It's a nice feeling.

* * *

Day 203. Dinner out with Gareth last night. He kissed her at her door, didn't try to come in. He'd only smiled at her, tall and handsome with curly brown hair and clear blue eyes. That smile had made Rose kiss him back, standing on her toes and pulling his head down to hers.

The kiss threw her into a whirl of confusion she still hasn't come out of. It feels wrong of her to have done so, even though there's no reason for it.

Jackie was asleep when Rose got in, and she was asleep when she left for work, but Jackie will be wanting to hear how it went. Pete will be there at work, ready to glower if necessary. He's not entirely happy she's seeing someone from work, but it's not against official policy. Rose thinks it's more to do with the fact that he does see her as his daughter, and he's reacting as any father would. She only hopes Mickey and Jake haven't heard anything of it, or they will tease her endlessly.

When Rose hops off the tube and starts towards Torchwood, Gareth is there, waiting for her outside the station.

"Good morning," she says. "Is this your stop?" She knows it's not, has seen his very nice car, but she's certainly willing to play along today.

"Good morning," he answers with a grin. "Going into work?"

"Why, yes, I am."

"Come on, then." He offers her his arm and she takes it with a small laugh. Not a giggle, she assures herself later. She is being very stern with herself and not allowing any giggles to come out.

This is what it means to be happy, she decides. This is what's been missing.

Rose is done for the day but doesn't feel like going home yet. She rings her mother and tells her so. "Don't wait for me. Think I'll do some shopping first."

"All right, sweetheart. Be careful."

"I always am. See you later."

Rose strolls down the street, admiring London in that magical time just before sunset. The sun is still in the sky but the lights are all lit in the shops, giving everything a festive glow. Christmas will be here soon, adding to the confusion and merriment.

Gareth had mentioned that he'd be at the shops tonight, buying gifts for his family. Rose isn't looking for him, not actively, but she allows herself to think about what they might do if she does bump into him. Do some shopping of her own, perhaps. Stop somewhere and have a drink before heading home. Maybe dinner out.

She is young and free and there is nothing in the world wrong with her having a boyfriend. She and Mickey have been over and done with for a long long time. She and Gareth haven't been dating very long, and it's far from serious, but heavens, he does make her laugh. She feels light and happy when she's with him, and that's a feeling she's not had enough of lately.

So why does this seem so hard? Why does every thought she has of Gareth come attached with odd feelings of warning, of guilt, of a pull that can't be explained?

Sometimes she thinks this world is far more different than she's ever dreamed of. The feeling that she just doesn't belong here on this Earth is a familiar one. Pete replaced her dad. Jackie's replaced Pete's first wife. Parallels for everyone but her. Even Mickey took the place of Rickey Smith on this world.

Maybe all she needs to do is fully accept the fact that her home is gone. She won't ever see the estate again, not that it's such a great loss. Her friends are gone, long since moved on or dead in the Cybermen attack.

Maybe she's finally growing up, Rose decides. The thought makes her smile and she starts to look around in earnest, hoping to bump into Gareth.

As she walks along the lights get a bit dimmer, and shops give way to small, intimate restaurants and dance clubs. It's darker here, without the lights of the shops to brighten things up. The dark makes her look up automatically, checking her position.

Rose doesn't often notice the night sky. The lights of London are bright, and zeppelins crowd the airspace.

Once, though, on a trip to the country to survey a suspicious blip of activity, she and Jake walked around a property in the dark. Her way lit only by a torch, Rose had looked up to the sky. Overhead were stars and constellations and it was like they were brand new and yet old friends.

The stars seemed familiar to her - like she knew them by name. And at the same time, a feeling of wrongness, that she'd missed something.

Rose looks up at the sky now. Dark, filled with zeppelins. Back home it would have been the occasional airplane.

She's tried to miss it, that other world. But her mother is here with her, and she has her father back. Mickey's friendship is here.

Rose turns back around and walks slowly back to the center of the shopping square. Standing there, right outside a chocolate shop, stands her boyfriend -

-Has she got a boyfriend now? Is that what's happening here?-

-holding onto some carrier bags and drinking something out of a plastic cup. He blinks with surprise when he sees her. He's still wearing his work clothes, a suit and tie and a brown overcoat.

Rose walks up to him slowly, aware that he is watching her every move. "Are you done shopping?" she asks.

He shakes his head wordlessly.

She bites her lip nervously. "What's left to -" She's cut off as he drops the cup and kisses her.

"Oh," is all she can say when he lets her go.

"Come help me find a scarf for my sister," Gareth says quietly. "And then maybe dinner?"

There is more, but Rose is not ready for that yet. She knows that he will be there when she is.

"Okay," she says, and takes the hand he offers her, holding it tightly so they won't get split up even if they have to run.

She doesn't realize she's spoken out loud until he looks down at her, a quizzical expression on his face. "Why would we need to run?" he wants to know.

Rose shrugs and shakes her head. "You never know," is all she can think to say.

* * *

Day 226. Rose is still keeping track of days. There's no reason to, no need to, but she's still doing it. Still watching the sweep of the clock's hands when she's in her office at Torchwood. The seconds and minutes and hours tick away, and she tries not to notice the rising panic that watching a clock seems to give her lately.

Gareth, at least, hasn't seemed to notice. They're dating casually, but Rose imagines that sometime soon it will have to turn serious or end. She's not ready for either one just yet. She doesn't think she's in love, but it's still early. Love isn't something you can rush, she tells herself, and then wonders what she knows of it. She didn't love Mickey, not in that way, and she certainly did not care for Jimmy Stone that way.

She goes for a walk one afternoon, the 226th day that she's been living on this parallel world. She slipped out after lunch with Gareth, telling him that she wanted some fresh air. He would have gone with her, perhaps, but he had a backlog of work to get through.

Jake and Mickey approve, teasing her about her boyfriend and his number crunching. She's kept her parents at arm's length when it comes to her fledgling relationship. She doesn't want them to get used to someone who might not be there some day. Who might be ripped away from her.

Rose walks down the street, wondering at the last image her mind has provided. Gareth won't be ripped away. He's an accountant, for goodness' sake. If anyone's in danger of being ripped away from their love, it's her.

Her. It's Rose who's in danger of losing the man she loves.

The thought comes out of nowhere, surprising her so much that she comes to a halt in the middle of the sidewalk. Someone pushes past her and she stumbles a bit.

Maybe she needs a psychiatrist, Rose thinks wildly. Maybe the trip across worlds has altered her brain chemistry or something.

That would explain all those odd dreams that she can't remember. This bizarre fascination with time. Thinking that Gareth is the man of her dreams when she knows damn well he's not.

That thought stops her cold. He's not the man of her dreams.

Is he?

If Jackie could see her now she'd have a fit and send Rose packing to the Doctor for a check-up.

Yes. That's what she needs.

"I need a doctor," she murmurs, and turns around to go back to work, to find Pete and ask him for help.

Something is wrong, and she needs the Doctor.

A doctor.

She needs _a_ doctor.

Rose moves into a storefront, away from the crowds walking past. Her hands are shaking. Moving quickly into the store, she buys a bottle of water and hopes no one is within camera-shot is taking photos of the Vitex heiress opting for clear water instead of fruity, vitamin-y goodness.

She feels better after she drinks the water. Just in case it's a simple case of low blood sugar, Rose also buys a chocolate bar. Eating it makes her feel much better, and she firmly shoves aside all those crazy thoughts and starts to walk back to work. Her thoughts are calm and focused and she makes sure they stay that way.

The walk back has a calming effect, and it's like the past half hour didn't happen. The sun is shining. She will go back to work and see what's going on for the afternoon. She will stop by Gareth's office and say hello. She'll think about what she'd like for dinner.

Rose's reverie is shattered by a strange whooshing sound. She glances around, confused, but seeing nothing out of the ordinary. She licks her lips and continues on her way.

The whooshing grows louder, grows stronger, and she stands still, feet braced. In front of her erupts a whirl of air. A blue box materializes out of nothing and lands with a crash, half on the pavement and half on the street. Rose blinks and jumps back. Glancing wildly around, she's stunned to note that no one else seems to notice. People continue to walk right past it, even though it's emitting that whooshing noise and it has a bright light on top.

Rose swallows hard and reaches for her phone.

Before she can dial Torchwood, for surely this isn't a normal incident, the doors of the call box, for that's what the blue box is, clatter from the inside. It looks like a telephone box, but Rose is fairly certain that no phone box is as mobile as this thing is. She waits and holds her breath.

The doors of the blue box burst open and a tall man comes out. He's looking all around, scanning the skies with an intent expression, and comes to a halt mere inches in front of her.

Rose stands her ground and waits.

He pulls a silver tube out of his pocket and turns around, bumping into her. As their eyes meet he blinks, the expression on his face changing to one of utter disbelief and then utter happiness.

Rose continues to watch him warily.

His stare grows intense as he looks down at her. He speaks, and she can't help but be startled by his words.

"I was wrong about the breach. I'm so sorry. But here I am!" He throws his arms wide, causing his long brown coat to flap around in the wind.

Rose takes a slow step backwards.

"But I made it! And I found you! Found you right off! I'm good. I am that, that good." He smiles happily at her. "Hello."

"Are you all right?" Rose asks finally.

"I am now! Now that I've found you." He reaches for her hands. Rose jerks them back, away from his grasp. She starts to flip her phone open.

"Isn't this brilliant?" he demands of her. "I found you! Right off the bat, first try! What are the odds of that happening?"

He waits, staring at her expectantly, a maniacal grin on his face.

She doesn't respond.

"Rose?" he asks finally.

"How do you know my name?" she demands, even though in this London she is fairly famous, just for being Pete's long lost daughter.

He laughs, a half laugh that turns uncertain. "This isn't funny, Rose. It's me."

She looks at him closely. "I'm sorry. Do I know you?"


	3. Chapter 3

**But if you can still dream**

The Doctor stares at her. Stares at her for a long, long time. "I'm sorry. Do you _know_ me? Do you have any idea what I've had to do to get myself here? That's not funny, Rose."

"I'm not being funny. Who are you?"

"I'm the Doctor," the Doctor says. "Obviously."

"Dr. Who?"

"Me! It's me, Rose!"

"I don't know you."

"You're Rose Tyler." His voice is low and he's staring at her as though he needs to memorize her every feature.

She stands and waits. He is a tall man, with unruly brown hair that ruffles in the breeze. His long brown coat covers a brown pinstriped suit. Beneath the suit jacket he wears a blue shirt and a loosely knotted tie of blue and brown. Rose is fascinated by that tie. Jerking her eyes away, she studies his face. He's so pale that freckles stand out against his nose. His eyes are brown and filled with confusion.

"Aren't you?"

He's a handsome bloke, she allows to herself, but he's clearly not all there.

And there's that flying blue box.

"Where did you come from?" she asks him, and hope blazes in his eyes.

"From our universe, of course! Our proper universe. I thought there was no way across worlds but I was wrong, and I don't often have to say that, as you know! I came back for you." The Doctor smiles at her and waits for her reaction. He's been anticipating laughter, maybe some tears. Hugging. There will definitely be hugging involved. He's waited a long time for this.

"This is my proper world," Rose says firmly, ignoring the small bite of panic.

The Doctor's anticipation and excitement fade a bit. "You're Rose Tyler."

"Yeah."

"And I'm the Doctor. You know me."

"Sorry, I don't."

The euphoria of landing in the right place and time abruptly fades. He looks around, beginning to pace as he thrusts his hands through his hair. "This is London. This is the place. That is Rose," he mutters to himself as he moves.

Rose tightens her hold on her mobile phone and glances around. No one is paying any attention to them. Will anyone stop if she starts to yell?

He spins around abruptly, catching her off guard and making her move back a step.

"Right," he says grimly. "I'm the Doctor. You have to remember me, Rose. Quickly."

"Excuse me?"

"Quickly," he repeats. "Before I lose this opening and we're both trapped here."

"I'm not trapped anywhere. Who are you? What's that blue box?"

"It's -" The look of utter hopelessness that crosses his face is startling. Rose frowns in unwilling sympathy. "I was wrong," he says quietly. "Again, apparently. I made a mistake. You're Rose Tyler but you're not the Rose Tyler I'm looking for. I've discovered another alternate universe."

Under other circumstances this would thrill the Doctor to no end, but these are not normal circumstances. There's no other explanation. He did not make it after all. He's as lost as Rose is.

"There's another me?" Rose asks before she can stop herself. "Another Rose Tyler somewhere?"

"She was my friend. I lost her." The painful simplicity of that statement hurts her.

"I'm sorry."

"I've been looking for her for a long time. Thought I finally made it." The Doctor looks hard at her again, running his gaze over her. "This is the closest yet," he says to himself. "But I'll get there."

He's about to turn away when a stopped bus lets off some passengers. One of them brushes against the bus, and a Vitex ad on the side of the bus activates.

"Trust me on this," Pete Tyler's voice says. His picture is on the bus, holding a bottle of Vitex in one hand and giving a thumbs up sign with his other hand.

The Doctor turns to the bus so quickly that his coat flares. "Pete Tyler," he murmurs. "Vitex. Cherry-lite." He slowly looks up, tracking his gaze to the sky. "Zeppelins," he says to himself.

Rose waits.

He turns to her, suddenly blazing and intense. "You are Rose Tyler," he says urgently, taking her by the shoulders. "You are the Rose I'm looking for."

"I'm not her!" Rose says angrily. "Let go or I'm calling the police."

"You used to travel with me. We saw things you could only imagine."

"I've never left London."

"Pete Tyler is not your real father."

"How do you know that?" she demands, fear shaking her voice. It's a secret they've worked hard to keep.

"You got a red bicycle for Christmas when you were twelve," he continues swiftly. "You left school for Jimmy Stone."

"Stop it."

"You got the bronze in gymnastics."

"Stop right now!"

"How did you get here? How did you end up on this world?"

Rose blinks. "What?"

"How did you get here? Without me - how did you leave your world?"

She shakes her head, not understanding but needing to keep the secret. "This is the only world."

"You know it's not. If nothing else, you still know that much." The Doctor looks down at her. "What happened?"

Rose is compelled by those eyes. She tries to fight it, tries to maintain the charade that they've started when she and Jackie arrived here. She can't bring herself to tell the lie again. Not to this man. Briefly she wonders if it's mind control. His eyes stare into her and she hears herself begin to speak, to explain what she's never discussed with anyone but her parents or Mickey and Jake.

"Cybermen came to London. This London. Robot monsters. They killed thousands, millions, throughout London and Europe. They were stopped and captured but they found a way to escape. They went to our world. Pete came with his team. They stopped the Cybermen and he brought my mum and me back here."

"What about the Daleks?" he demands. "What happened to them?"

"What's a Dalek?"

"What's a Dalek," he repeats to himself. "You don't remember me," the Doctor states, finally saying the obvious.

"Sorry," she says, not sounding sorry at all.

"Captain Jack Harkness. Face of Boe. The Mighty Jagrafess?"

"What?"

The Doctor stops talking and paces again. Rose is getting nervous. They're out in public, in plain sight of hundreds of people, but this guy is acting more than a bit odd.

"You said the Cybermen came through. To this world? And then to your world. And Pete stopped them? Just Pete stopped them here?"

"Pete and the Preachers."

"And you had no hand in it?"

"I wasn't here then," Rose says.

"I don't believe this," he mutters, rubbing his forehead.

"That was a long time ago."

"We were here," he says quietly, and is forced to watch while she laughs and shakes her head.

"We were not."

"We stopped them here. You and I, at Lumic's headquarters, where he was creating them. We stopped it and we escaped."

"Look, I don't know what fiction you've been reading-"

"And then they came through to our universe, to your London. I stopped them again. We stopped them but I lost you."

"You can't have lost me," Rose says patiently. "You don't know me."

"We were closing the Void and you slipped. You fell through but Pete Tyler grabbed you. He brought you here. I found you through a crack in time."

"Please stop." Rose knows she should leave but she can't bring herself to. Something is compelling her to stay, and the compulsion is frightening her even more than this lunatic's ravings. She glances around for a policeman, for a familiar face, but no one stops, no one looks their way.

"I burned up a sun to say goodbye," the Doctor continues. "I was just an image. I couldn't get you back." Even saying the words hurts. The Doctor says them anyway, determined to make Rose remember.

The look on her face clearly tells him she is having none of this. How can it not be his Rose? It's the same stubborn, skeptical expression. The same brown eyes, same blonde hair. Even the dark eyeliner and mascara are the same. It has to be Rose. He will not allow it to be anything else.

The Doctor tries another way. "You work for Torchwood, don't you? You were serious, when you told me that. Tell me you're not back at the shop."

"I'm going now," she says firmly, but she stops when he takes hold of her arm.

He loses his sense of rightness, of time, of reality. All he knows is that he's found her and he's somehow lost her, before he even got to her. "Rose! Please!" He's holding her close to him, his eyes wide and frantic.

"Let me go," she says carefully.

"You are Rose Marion Tyler," he says definitely. "You are my friend. We've traveled together, all across the universe! All through time!"

"No. That's impossible," she says automatically, ignoring the small ring of recognition.

He lets go of her. "But you admit that you weren't born on this world."

"I'm not saying anything."

"You already did," he points out.

"No, I didn't," she says swiftly.

"You were born on that other world, the one with no zeppelins. You worked at Henriks! What happened to your job? I blew it up!" he says triumphantly before she can answer.

"There was a gas leak," Rose says slowly. "The building blew up." How does he know all these things about her? Pete worked long and hard and paid plenty of cash to ensure that the true facts of her previous life were buried.

"No gas leak. Shop dummies were animated and I blew up the store to stop them."

"What?" If Rose needed further proof that she should not be having this conversation, there it is. She takes a step away from him.

"Where's Jackie?" he asks, shocking her. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but we need your mother. In fact, after this is over, forget that I ever said it."

Despite herself, despite all the warnings her mother has ever given her about strange men, Rose feels a pull of attraction for this man. Something is not right, even though he is clearly insane. At the same time, a spark of alarm hits her.

"I'm not calling my mother," she says. "You leave her alone!"

"We'll go to her."

"We're not going to my house." Rose shakes her head and walks away. "Goodbye."

"No, Rose! Wait!" He grabs her hand and before Rose pulls it back she is almost overwhelmed by a feeling of longing and loneliness and joy, all wrapped up in one quick moment.

"Go to your house," he tells her. "I'll meet you there."

"You don't know where I live," she says, although their address is public record.

"I was there before," he tells her. "With you," he adds.

"With me."

His expression grows soft and he smiles at her, such a fond smile. "We were together, Rose Tyler. And before I'm done I'll make you remember me. Remember us."

Rose searches his face, feels fear and danger and a strong urge to run. "Stay away from me," she warns him. "Stay away, or you'll be sorry."

The Doctor watches her walk away, moving so quickly that she's almost jogging. He turns to look around. He can see Torchwood Tower from here, towering over its neighboring buildings. His face turns grim.

* * *

"Mum! Mum!" Rose took a taxi back to the house and is racing up the front steps. "Mum!"

The maid Marie meets her at the door. "There is someone here to see you, Miss Rose."

"No time," Rose says hastily. "My mother -"

"He's here to see her, too. He only wanted to wait until you got here."

"Tell him to come back. Listen, if someone comes to the door, asking for me, a man in a suit, tell him I'm not here. Don't let him in."

"He's already here," Marie says. "He's waiting for you."

"What?" Rose stops on her way up the stairs to find Jackie. "What?"

"He's in the living room."

"What?" Rose says again.

Walking into the living room, she sees him sitting on the couch, legs crossed, looking for all the world like he's on holiday.

"Hello," he greets her. "Took you long enough."

"How did you get here?" Rose demands. "You couldn't have gotten here before me. It's impossible."

"And yet here I am," he says genially. "Funny thing, that."

"How did you get here so fast?"

He smiles at her, such a charming smile that she almost smiles back. But he doesn't answer her.

"What do you want?"

"I told you. I want you back. You with memory intact, preferably. It wouldn't be nearly the same thing, you with no memory of me, would it? We'd be more like strangers than friends. We've had a lot of adventures. I'd hate for you to lose that. Although, judging by your reaction to me so far, you've already lost all that. So you could say I'm here to get those back for you."

Rose takes a deep breath. "You are a lunatic. Now, I'm going to ask you very nicely to please leave before I call the authorities and have you taken away."

"I'm not leaving without you," the Doctor says, and his voice is hard and definite. "I found you and I'm not leaving you behind again. Rose, you need to remember."

"Get out," she says quietly. "Now."

"Not without you." His hands clench into fists but he fights to remain calm.

"You can't have me!" Rose moves over to him, eyes blazing, and he quickly comes to his feet. "This is stalking," she says clearly. "This is stalking and its illegal and I will have you prosecuted."

"You're mine," he says angrily. "You swore to stay with me forever and now that I found a way to get back to you I'm not leaving you!"

"I never said anything of the sort!" she says indignantly. In the back of her mind a small voice starts to sing _forever, forever_. She ignores it.

"You said you were never gonna leave me," the Doctor continues. He's had so much time alone to think about Rose, to miss her and remember what she'd said to him, and he's not going to waste any more time in silly games. "Come with me so I can fix you. Right now."

"Rose?"

They both turn at the sound of Jackie's voice. She's standing in the doorway, looking confused. "Are you all right? Why are you shouting?"

"Yeah, Mum. I'm fine. This man was just leaving."

"Jackie!" the Doctor moves to her, neatly evading Rose's attempt to stop him. "Jackie, slap me!"

"What?" Jackie looks bewildered.

"It's me, Jackie, remember? The Doctor."

Jackie looks at Rose. "Rose, love, are you sick? What do you need a doctor for?""

"No, Mum," Rose says, despairing of ever getting this back on track.

"Then- oh!" Jackie expression grows absurdly hopeful. "Are you a doctor, then? How lovely. Where did you two meet?"

"You probably wouldn't believe me, at the moment," the Doctor remarks. "Although someday we'll no doubt have a good laugh about it. Right after you punch me."

"Mum!" Rose snaps. "He's not here to meet you."

"Oh, of course not," Jackie says hurriedly. "I'd forgotten about Gareth, that's all."

"Mum!" In the middle of this, Rose can still be exasperated with her mum. How can Jackie forget someone she's met so often in the past few weeks?

"Gareth?" the Doctor repeats, turning back to Rose. "Who the hell is Gareth?"

Despite herself Rose quails before the look of anger in his eye. "He's...he's my boyfriend." She's never said that out loud, and to be saying it for the first time to a stranger who needs to be sectioned is a bit odd.

"Boyfriend!'' he explodes. "I don't think so! I'd only just gotten rid of Mr. Mickey!" He points his finger at her. "There will be no more boyfriends, Rose Tyler! I'm done with the Mickeys and the Adams and the Jacks of the world, thank you very much!"

"You know Mickey?" Jackie asks, completely out of her depth with this tall stranger. He's a handsome bloke - too bad he seems a bit unhinged.

"Oh, for-" The Doctor tears his coat off and throws it on the floor. "Jackie, it's me. You can't stand me! Come on, throw a punch! Yell at me for risking your daughter's life!"

Jackie stares at him "You are bonkers."

"But you're Jackie Tyler, right? Married to Pete? He died on the way to Sarah and Stuart's wedding. Rose was just a baby."

Jackie gasps and her face goes pale.

"Mum, it's okay!" Rose hurries to her and helps her sit down.

"You met this Pete back on your own world, when Torchwood came through. He brought you and Rose back here."

Jackie's breath leaves her in a rush, her fears of being found out suddenly coming true. "Who are you? How do you know all this?"

"He doesn't know anything, I promise!" Rose tells her mother. "Leave her alone. She's pregnant!" she hisses at him.

"I _know_! You told me so!"

"I told you so? When?"

"On a beach called Darlig Ulv Stranden."

"Where is that?"

"In Norway."

"I've never been to Norway, you idiot! Now get out."

"You said me you loved me!" he says desperately, and Jackie hits at a button on the side of her chair.

"Show this man out," Jackie tells the maid who appears in the room. "Now. And then reset the security system. He should never have been let inside the doors."

"Rose," he pleads.

But she stays with her mother. He swallows hard and allows himself to be ushered out of the house.

It's the right world, he tells himself, pacing back and forth inside the TARDIS. Right world, right universe. Right Rose. His Rose.

Only it's not.

How could she forget him? Granted, he's not all that fantastic, maybe, but they shared so much together! She'd risked her life to save him more than once. He'd sent her to safety and she came back to him. More than once. He was risking the state of two universes to get back to her. And here she was, telling him she didn't know him. Jackie didn't know him.

"What's happened?" he asks. "What's happened?"

The TARDIS hums in sympathy.

Inside the house, Rose tries to stop shaking. Jackie is not helping.

"You just met him on the street," Jackie says in horror. "Rose, this world isn't like the one we came from! You're rich here, and people will do anything to try and get something from your dad."

"He wasn't a kidnapper, Mum," Rose says.

"A blackmailer! How does he know all those things about us? How did he find out?"

"I don't know."

"We have to find him," Jackie says. "We need to make sure he doesn't tell anyone else."

"Mum?"

"We need your father. I'm calling him right now."

Rose only half registers her mother's departure. Her attention has been caught by the brown coat, lying in a puddle on the floor. Moving to it slowly, as though it were a bomb about to go off, she picks it up. It looks like a normal trench coat, but it is surprisingly heavy. She gives it an experimental shake and is surprised to hear things rattle around. As she holds it close she catches the smell, clean and fresh and oddly familiar. Suddenly Rose feels safe and whole, like nothing bad could ever happen to her again. It's a feeling she used to have all the time, and only now that she's realized it's been missing does she understand how much she's missed it.

She doesn't stop to question why that feeling's been gone, doesn't wonder what happened to it. Bundling the coat in her arms, she runs outside.

She is not particularly surprised to see a blue box standing on the lawn. _He_ is standing outside the doors, apparently about to come back to the house. She can't help but admire his stubbornness. He catches sight of her and stops, watching her come closer.

"Doctor?" she says tentatively.

The hope that shows on his face is almost painful. "Rose?"

"Is that what you're called?" she asks him. "Just Doctor, yeah? Nothing else?"

The hope fades. She still doesn't know him. He fights down the disappointment. "Just Doctor." He holds out his hand for the coat. "Thanks."

"Look," she begins. "I'm very sorry, really I am, but you have me confused with someone else. Maybe your friend is on some other world, waiting for you."

"I didn't want you to wait for me," he answers, staring out across the lawn. "I didn't think I'd ever see you again. I tried to accept that."

"But you kept looking?" she can't help asking.

"I had to. I couldn't go on without you. I was rubbish." He shrugs. "I'd pictured our reunion many times, Rose, but I never thought you'd forget about me."

"I never knew you," Rose says, as patiently as she can manage.

"Oh, but you did, Rose. You did." He looks from her to the street. "Are you having company?"

Rose turns around. "It's Mickey. And Jake."

The Doctor puts his coat back on and waits.

"Marie must have called them as soon as she realized you shouldn't have been in the house," Rose murmurs.

"Helpful Marie," he says sardonically.

"Get out of the way, Rose!" Mickey calls, jumping out of the car.

Jake follows, and trains a gun on them.

"Put it down, Jake," the Doctor says impatiently. "I'm not here to hurt anyone. Hello, Mickey."

"Who is this bloke?" Mickey asks Rose. "Marie sounded right upset."

Rose sighs heavily. Her day is just getting more and more complicated. "He's called the Doctor."

Jake keeps his gun trained. "Dr. Who?"

"Just Doctor," the Doctor says in annoyance. "Honesty, how many times do I have to introduce myself to you people?"

"Just the once."

"We've already met, Jake. I was here with Rose and Mickey when they Cybermen came through. They attacked this house and killed Jackie Tyler. We stopped them at Lumic's headquarters. Mickey, you saved us by driving a zeppelin and letting us escape."

The Doctor is only reciting the facts as they are, but the three of them stare at him like he's grown another head.

"You were part of the Preachers," the Doctor continues. In for a penny and all that.

"The Preachers and Pete beat back the Cybermen. I've never met you before."

"Well you would say that, wouldn't you?" The Doctor loses all patience, although he does resist the urge to yell at the sky.

"Look. I am the Doctor. I am from another universe. Just like Rose and Mickey. You know me - all of you. Rose was your girlfriend, Mickey. We traveled together until you decided to stay here on this world. Rose and I went back to our proper world."

Mickey regards him for a minute. "Why would I choose to stay here?"

"Because Rose..." the Doctor pauses. "You wanted to stay. Your gran was here."

"I came with Pete to fight the Cyberman."

"Yes, yes, yes. And when they came through to Rose's world you all headed that way to stop them."

"Yeah." Mickey raises an eyebrow and cocks a gun at him. "Sure we did."

The Doctor really doesn't know why he bothers with humans. "You've all forgotten," he says. "Something has affected your memories. Yours and Jackie's," he says to Rose. "And these two," he adds.

"We all know you?" Rose asks skeptically. "But none of us can remember?"

"For the last time, yes!" The Doctor scowls at her.

Mickey looks at him, expressionless. "Sorry, mate."

"Mickey, it's me! The Doctor!"

When Mickey continues to look at him, he turns to Jake.

"Jake! You've met me."

Jake shrugs. "Sorry."

"Mrs. Moore! I was with her when she died!"

"Mrs. Moore died alone. She was killed by a Cyberman," Jake says woodenly.

"I know. I was there with her."

But the Doctor is getting nowhere with these people.

"Rose, get in the house," Mickey says. "The others are coming."

Rose allows herself to be pulled to the house. "What others?"

"Torchwood others," Mickey says shortly, and the Doctor shakes his head in disgust.

Jake and Mickey lock the house up tight. Rose makes sure her mum is doing all right, and she is drawn back to the windows by a whooshing sound.

"What's that?" Mickey asks.

"He's gone. He left in that blue box."

Mickey looks through the window. "What blue box?"

"The phone box! That big box we were standing in front of outside."

"There was no blue box there," Mickey says, and moves to answer the door as Pete comes home to check on his family.

Rose looks back out the window.

"A flying blue box," she murmurs.


	4. Chapter 4

**Close your eyes it will seem**

The Doctor reasons through this on his own. He's on the right universe. He may have been a bit thick when he first met Rose, but now that she's gone he can think clearly. The TARDIS instruments agree with him - this is the same place they came to some years back, when the Cybermen attacked.

So this Rose really is his Rose.

So what's happened?

He can trace the timelines. He can see where they were one, can see where, suddenly, they diverge and continue on to a different path. It had to be here, on this planet, that the split occurred. Someone on this planet did this.

"But why?" he asks the TARDIS. "Why do this? Why erase Rose's memories of me? And Jackie and the others? It makes no sense."

The TARDIS doesn't answer. He props his chin on his hand and gazes into nothingness, thinking. His hair stands on end after being pulled through his fingers.

He'll have to follow the path of the timelines, trace the ones that belong to Rose. Programming the TARDIS controls, he follows that path. He follows Rose's timeline, guessing that if anyone's timeline was tampered with to cause this, it would be hers. Working backwards, slowly, carefully, he tracks it down.

There.

He sets the controls and the TARDIS lands. He's out the door, looking around. He will feel it, the cause.

And he does. He's still on Earth, on Rose's Earth, not the one they met on. Moving through the crowds, he determines he's in England, though not in London. Now that he's closer he feels the tangled threads of time, and moves to their end.

It's a gypsy. He stands still and blinks. Of all the possibilities, aliens and accidents and what-have-yous, a simple gypsy never occurred to him.

Maybe he's losing his touch.

"Well." He enters the small storefront, located on a tiny main street of a small town. It could be any other shop in any other town in Great Britain, but for the sign on the door that proclaims that Madame de Lancie is open Monday through Thursday until 5 pm.

Bells on the door jingle as he enters. The scent of incense hits him in the face and he coughs to clear his throat.

"Good afternoon." From behind a dark curtain comes a woman dressed all in black. She could be anywhere from 30 to 60. Silk scarves hang from her arms and her waist.

"Madame de Lancie, I presume?" the Doctor asks politely.

"How may I help you? Have you come to have your palm read?" she smiles. "Or perhaps your future told?"

"No, er, no thanks. I'm looking for a -"

"Crystal ball gazing is $25 for 15 minutes," she tells him briskly.

"What? No, I don't need any gazing. I've a friend who came to see you some time ago. I'm wondering if you might help me."

"My clients are all confidential."

He watches her closely. "Perhaps she was in town for her work. Are you familiar with Torchwood?"

Her face pales. "I cannot help you. Good day."

"No, wait. I'm not part of Torchwood. Believe me, I'm not. Whoever you are, _whatever_ you are, I only want information."

"That's all anyone ever wants," she snaps. "At first."

"At all," he assures her. "Any unusual activity?"

"Come." She turns on her heel in a whirl of silk and disappears behind a curtain of brightly colored beads.

The Doctor glances around cautiously and follows.

She is sitting at a small round table that is draped with more silk scarves. A crystal ball sits on a stand in the center of the table. As the Doctor takes the seat opposite her, she pushes the crystal ball away.

"My name is Madame de Lancie," she says without preamble. "My professional name, anyway. I read tarot cards, tell fortunes, read tea leaves."

"But that's not all," he prompts her.

"No. Sometimes I feel... premonitions. Warnings of things to come. I felt that some time ago. A strong urge to hide, to flee."

"And did you?"

"No, of course not. I don't follow premonitions."

"You're in a funny line of work then," he can't help commenting.

She smiles. "Perhaps. But I've been successful."

"Torchwood was here."

Her smile disappears. "Yes."

"When?"

"Some time ago. A few weeks, perhaps."

"What were they doing here?"

She hesitates. "Something came to the town. I don't know what it was. The locals say it was a ship or something. Torchwood arrived soon afterwards."

"What were they following?"

"They never said. They cordoned off the area."

He waits.

"They never said."

"But you know."

"Of course not."

"Aliens," he suggests.

"No such thing," she says, so quickly that he moves in closer.

"Have you seen aliens around?"

"Don't be absurd."

"Are you an alien?" he asks, and watches as alarm flares briefly in her eyes.

"No," she says. "I'm as human as you are."

"Yes. Well, as to that...well. Is something helping your abilities along? Alien technology that you've stumbled across?"

Her eyes are wide. "Who are you?"

"I think my friend came to see you. She man have been part of that Torchwood team. Maybe you read her fortune."

Madame de Lancie sits back. "I read many fortunes. Should I read yours, it will cost you."

He smiles at her "No, thanks. My friend is called Rose Tyler."

"My customers don't use names."

"She's young. Blonde hair."

"Sorry."

He's getting impatient. "Something's happened. My friend has lost all memory of me. Something I never would have believed possible."

"You have a very high opinion of yourself," she says, but recognition is in her face.

"You know her! What happened?"

Her lip trembles. "I don't know. I can't help you. I'm sorry." She starts to stand and he grabs her wrist.

"I know more than you think," he says in a deadly voice. "I'd rather not force you to help me. Tell me what you know."

"Time is not a straight line. It curves and twists, dances and bends and runs in a circle. It goes forward and back and sideways. I can't do anything unless she is here with me."

The Doctor stares at her. Humans do not normally go on about time like that. Of course, humans normally don't possess the power to alter time and memories. He tries to think of possibilities.

"Are you a Trickster?" he asks, and waits for the answer.

She tilts her head. "I am a teller of fortunes. I don't know what a Trickster is."

"Someone who can alter time, alter fate. A person's destiny can change in the blink of an eye, history altered forever."

She considers this. "Interesting. But that is not what I am."

"Who are you, then?"

She is reluctant to answer.

"Tell me what I wish to know," the Doctor says, "or things will not go easy for you."

"I can sometimes change outcomes," she says finally. "If a person wishes it badly enough."

"Outcomes? Of lives? Of reality?"

"Not always. Only when someone wants it badly enough. Only when I need it badly enough."

"What do you need badly enough?" he asks, but he knows the answers, or suspects he does.

"The potential of fate, the energy that comes from it. If someone - your friend, for instance - wants to rid their memory of an event, I can sometimes do it."

"Change their memories?"

"Change the event," she corrects him. "In exchange they receive something more preferable, and I receive the energy from the painful event and its reminders."

"What, like, like psychic energy?"

"In a way."

"Why?"

"I...I cannot say. Only that I do so."

He stares at her, utterly baffled. "That is something new to me. And I don't often see things I've never see before."

"In one so young that's truly surprising."

He sighs. "I'm not so young. Can you change it?"

"Sometimes." But she will not meet his eyes.

Something does not add up here. He can't put his finger on it yet, but he will. First things first, though.

"I will bring my friend to you, and you will put things back the way they were." There is no room for interpretation in his voice, no hint of second chances for her if she refuses.

"I do not know that it was I who did this to your friend. If something did indeed happened to her." Her voice gets a bit louder, for no reason the Doctor can ascertain.

She looks behind her, although as far as the Doctor can tell there is only a wall at her back. "I will try," she says to him in a quiet voice. "But everything comes at a cost."

* * *

That night Rose dreams that she is falling. It's not new, this dream. She's had it before. The sensation of falling. Holding on, trying to stay put, but losing her grip and falling through space. Someone is screaming her name as she falls.

She wakes up at the same point every time, just before she falls into darkness.

Only this time, tonight, she remembers the dream when she wakes up.

She's disoriented, and it takes a second for her to figure out that she can't breathe because she's crying too hard. As she sits up she notes that her hands are stretched out. She's trying to reach for someone.

Wiping at her eyes, unsure why she's crying at all, Rose lies back down. Cries herself to sleep without knowing why.

* * *

Pete Tyler sees his wife that night. Not Jackie, lying beside him now, but the Jackie who was killed by Cybermen the night of her birthday party. She's wearing the black dress she wore that night. They're escaping from Lumic, running to a zeppelin, and it's Jackie who's running with him but it's not. Her face changes to Rose's face, and the black dress turns into a black tuxedo.

Pete wakes with a jerk, confused. Turning to look at Jackie, he gently touches the mound of her stomach to reassure himself.

They told him of the lunatic who confronted Rose. He followed her home and knows all about the details they've been keeping secret. Pete worries about blackmail, about kidnapping threats, about what would happen if the news got out. To him, to Vitex, to Torchwood. The risk seemed small, when he begged Jackie and her daughter to come with him to this world.

Now he has so much to lose, all of it in this house.

The man has not been caught, but Pete is confident that he will be. He will not allow anything else.

* * *

That night Jackie dreams of a tall man with piercing blue eyes. He's got her Rose and he won't let her come home. Jackie wakes up with a feeling of deep, intense anger, so strong that she doesn't recognize herself. She's never felt such anger for anyone or anything in her life.

She tries to calm herself, for the sake of the baby she's carrying. When she wakes up the next morning the memory is gone, but the sight of Rose's leather jacket makes her frown.

* * *

Mickey Smith dreams of flying through the air in a cardboard box. A voice with a northern accent is calling him an idiot. In his sleep, Mickey scowls with annoyance.

* * *

The Doctor lands the TARDIS back at the Tyler mansion. The perception filter will do its job, and the only person he's worried about is Rose. He's prepared to wait for a bit, until she comes out of the house. He may have to talk her into coming with him. He may have to stun her with the sonic screwdriver. Either option is acceptable right now. He has to get her to that fortune teller. He has to reverse whatever's happened. It's not just Rose who's been affected, but others as well. This needs to be fixed.

His mission is given a boost when Rose comes out of the house. She's walking directly over to the TARDIS, and he hurries outside to meet her.

"What is this thing?" she asks him, motioning to the TARDIS. "No one else could see it."

"There's a perception filter on it. Keeps people from noticing it."

"I noticed it."

"Yeah. Well. You used to travel in it. With me."

"That's what you said." She doesn't sound very encouraging.

He tries to think of the obvious things that would appeal to Rose Tyler. Anything that would make him seem rational and sane. "Your things are here with me. Things you left behind."

"What things?"

"Your room is intact. All your stuff. The stuff you had when we were traveling around. I have it with me."

"With you?" She surveys his person, clad in the brown suit and white trainers.

"Not on me, obviously. Inside."

"Inside you?"

"Inside my ship."

She looks beyond him. "The blue box. It was moving before, wasn't it? Was I imagining it?"

"Come and see," he invites her, and walks back to the TARDIS.

Rose knows she shouldn't. Part of her knows she should get away, that this might be a trick. Despite that she moves closer, drawn to the TARDIS as if it were calling out her name. "I don't get it. It's a phone box."

He opens the doors. "Come inside."

"To that little thing?" she laughs. "No way."

He simply enters, leaving the doors ajar.

Rose fights with herself for a moment, and finally takes a deep breath and steps inside. She comes to a halt with an audible gasp and looks around in horror and amazement. "What is this?"

"My ship."

"It's...it's not a call box."

"No."

"It's alien," she states.

"Yup."

"Are you alien?"

"Yes."

Rose swallows and stares at him.

"Is that all right?" he asks.

"Yeah," she says quickly. "Yeah."

"It's called the TARDIS, this thing," he tells her. "T-A-R-D-I-S. Time And Relative Dimension In Space."

Rose doesn't know what to say. She walks to the middle of the room, where a large structure appears to be growing out of the floor. It's made of some sort of material that looks almost alive.

Cautiously, without knowing why, she reaches out her hand and touches it. It hums, and she snatches her hand back.

"She remembers you," the Doctor says.

"What?"

"You've been here before. We used to travel together."

"I've never gone traveling," she denies, looking away from the console. "I've never been here. I don't know you." She heads for the door, and the Doctor knows that if he lets her go it will be all that much harder to get her back.

He locks the doors and leaps for the control panel.

"Let me out!" she says in alarm.

He's already flying through the Time Vortex. "We're going to find out who did this to you," he tells her. "And then, if you're still not convinced, if we can't get your memory back..." He falters at the thought.

"What then?" she prompts him, curiosity overcoming her anger.

"Then I'll take you home."

"Home. And what will you do?" she asks quietly. "If I don't remember you?"

He looks a bit lost at that. Despair and grief swirl through his eyes for just a moment. Rose hesitates and opens her mouth to speak.

He forces a smile. "Hope I can still get through the breach and go home to my proper universe."

"Your universe?" she questions. "What about your world?"

"Haven't got one," he says briskly.

"How can you not? Where is your home?"

"My home is gone," he tells her, and it's amazing how much it hurts to have to explain all this to her again. So he decides that he won't. He'll perhaps leave this Rose Tyler a little better off than before. "Nothing else to tell."

Well. Rose may have lost her memories - _may_ have - she stresses to herself, but she can still take a hint.

"I'm sorry," she says softly. "What about your family?"

He takes a deep breath. "Gone, too," he says, and it's not so bad if he says it quickly. "I was alone for a long time before you."

"And after me?"

He looks at her, emotion strong in his face. "After you there was the two of us," he says softly. "You and me."

"So we traveled together," she says. "Were we friends?"

"Oh, yes," he says eagerly, smiling at her. "Good friends."

"So I wanted to stay with you?" Rose persists.

He steps over to her, crossing the grated floor of the console room. "You wanted to stay with me," he tells her in a voice that's little more than a whisper. "I tried sending you home when things got dangerous and you came right back."

"Like a bad penny?" she quips, but he doesn't smile.

"Like someone who didn't want to leave."

"Why didn't I want to leave?" she whispers, but the words he said to her at the house hang in the air between them.

The Doctor lifts his hand and touches her face. He tells himself he shouldn't be doing this, shouldn't be acting like this is his Rose when it's clearly not, but he can't stop himself.

Rose's gaze holds his, her lips falling open as she stares at his mouth. Something is familiar and something is different here, and she's not sure which is which.

"You hurt so much," she says softly, "don't you? I can see it, and I only just met you. Pain and loneliness and grief."

"Rose," he whispers. "Rose."

The TARDIS lands with a thump, and his hand falls from her face.

The Doctor clears his throat and wonders frantically what's come over him. He steps away from her, reaching to find his balance again. He'd spent much of their time together trying to distance himself, and the first few moments they're together he's doing things he never would have done before. "Here we are."

Rose blinks rapidly. What just happened? Was she really going to kiss a man she doesn't know? One who has mental issues and is an alien?

He's landed them in the same place as before. The Doctor checks the computer and nods, satisfied that they're where he wants to be. So far this trip the TARDIS has been cooperating. "Come on," he says, and waves to the doors.

The last thing Rose wants to do is follow him, but she's come this far. Slowly she moves to the doors. They open at her touch and she steps out and looks around.

"We've moved," she says in wonder. The TARDIS - or whatever it was that he called his ship - is standing in a field in the country. She can see a small village not too far away.

"Yes. Do you know where we are?"

"It's..." Rose looks around, her Torchwood training kicking in as she takes note of landmarks. "It's familiar."

"You know it?"

"We were just here." Rose turns to look up at him. "An explosion over by the water. It was a craft that had to be contained. We found some small alien objects there. Why are we here?"

"Something happened to you while you were here," he tells her excitedly. "I think I may know what."

"Nothing happened to me. Except that I got very wet. It was raining."

"Come on. There's a woman here." He takes her hand, a gesture so well-remembered to him that it's automatic.

Rose's reaction is to pull away. He tries to ignore the feeling of hurt.

"Right!" he says. "This way."

Rose stays behind a bit, confused by her own reaction. She just doesn't go around holding on to strange men - and if there's a stranger man than this one around she doesn't know it - but she's hurt him by pulling away. And on top of that is the feeling of closeness to him. She is drawn to him, pulled to him, and she wants nothing more than to touch him.

She follows him, catching up with him despite his longs strides.

"Haven't you got any other clothes?" she asks without thinking.

He looks down at her. "Sorry?"

"Your clothes. All I've seen you wear is that suit. Haven't you got anything else?"

He shrugs. "This is what I get."

"Get where?"

"Get from my wardrobe each day. The TARDIS does my laundry."

"Does it?"

"Used to do yours, on occasion." They've come to a halt and are staring at each other in the field, leaning in close to one another to hear.

"Did it?" Rose asks skeptically.

"Sometimes. Sometimes you brought it home to your mum. She liked that."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." He smiles at her. A breeze blows her hair around. She brushes it away from her face. Her hand encounters his, reaching for that same strand of hair. His fingers move instead to her cheek, softly caressing her skin.

"I've missed you, Rose," he says quietly.

She doesn't know what to say to that. To say she's missed him too would be a lie. And yet she knows if he leaves her now she will be unaccountably bereft.

"Doctor," she murmurs, and tilts her head up to his.

Of all the things he wants and needs from her, her memory is the most important. Without that she's just a shell of the girl he knew, and he is nothing more than a man to her.

"Come on," he says. "Let's get this fixed." He takes her hand and pulls her along. Rose lets him this time, and makes herself acknowledge the fact that it feels right and familiar and wonderful. Acknowledging that fact unnerves her, and she stops.

Misunderstanding why, the Doctor turns to her. "It will be all right," he assures her.

"How do you know?"

"I do. This is the only way, Rose."

She looks away. "What if you're wrong?"

He looks affronted, as though the suggestion that he might be wrong is incredibly insulting. Maybe it is. Maybe he's never wrong. "What if I'm wrong about what?"

"About me. What if I'm not who you're looking for? What if your friend is still out there somewhere?"

"She's not. She's you."

It's such an act of faith, to believe this man who's not a man. Rose can't deny that she does feel something for him, but it's only because he's handsome and charming and mysterious. No other reason. Certainly not because she's starting to believe him.

She's afraid. To believe him is to accept a truth that can't possibly be true. If he's right, her life is a lie. What will happen to her parents, to Mickey and Jake?

"What will happen to everyone?"

"Everyone?"

"If..._if_ this is true and I'm your ...your friend and I get fixed - what'll happen to everything? To everyone?"

The Doctor regards her soberly. "That will be up to you, Rose. All I want is to make sure you get your memories back."

And that is all he wants. He came back for Rose for purely selfish reason: he missed her. Not finding her the way he expected reminded him that humans are fragile. Finding her without her proper thoughts was worse than losing her in the first place. If she regains those and wants him to go, then he will.

So the Doctor tells himself, anyway. What he'll actually do if that happens is still undecided.

"It's right down here," he tells her, not reaching for her hand. "Come on."


	5. Chapter 5

**That you can see me now and then**

Madame de Lancie watches them approach from behind her counter.

"You again," is her only comment.

The Doctor thrusts Rose forward. "Here she is. My friend. Tell me what you know."

Madame de Lancie sighs heavily. "This way," she says, and walks through to the back of her store.

Rose hangs back. Things are getting weirder and weirder, and she's not sure who to listen to.

"It's all right," the Doctor says in her ear. "She can help us."

"I don't need help," she protests, turning around to tell him this. His face is still close to hers, and her lips brush his cheek. A flush rises slowly across his cheekbones and his eyes sweep shut for an instant.

Rose loses all sense of herself. She keeps turning, hesitantly touches the lapels of his coat.

"Rose," he whispers. "Who am I?"

"I'm not sure," she confesses just as softly. "But I know you. I know the shape of your face and your freckles and your dimple. I know that your hair wasn't always this long or this light."

The hope on his face is painful to see. "Are you starting to remember?"

She slides her hands up his lapels. "No. I just...know." Her hands flatten against his chest and she feels his breathing quicken.

"We can't," he says, and it's clearly just noise because he's already moving in to her.

"I have to," she tells him. "I don't know why, but I need to." The need to kiss him is nearly overwhelming. Along with it is a feeling of urgency, like she has to do it now while she has the chance. And she's about to kiss him when her hands feel the beat of his heart in his chest.

Beats. Of his hearts.

She snatches her hands back, too surprised to do anything else.

"You have two hearts."

"I'm an alien," he reminds her. "Comes with the spaceship and traveling through time."

"What have you done to me?" she asks in confusion. "These feelings..."

"Will hopefully deepen and remain intact for a long, long time," he assures her.

"What are you doing?" Madame de Lancie demands, peering through her curtain back at them. "Come on."

Rose slides away from him, out of his arms.

The Doctor sighs. "We're coming."

They walk through the beaded curtain. Madame de Lancie is already seated at her table.

"I've seen this place before," Rose says. "Who are you?"

"You've been here," Madame de Lancie states.

"No," Rose denies, at the same time the Doctor says, "Yes!"

"We don't know that," Rose says primly.

The Doctor shakes his head. "Honestly. You're determined to deny this to the end, just because you don't understand it."

"Understand what? Some lunatic who tells me he knows me?"

"I do know. And I'm not a lunatic, thanks."

Madame de Lancie interrupts them. "This is incredibly dangerous. It may have repercussions you're not prepared to deal with."

"Fooling with time in the first place was incredibly dangerous," the Doctor says in a hard voice. "Restore Rose's memories and I may forget what you've done."

"You have no hold over me," she snaps back.

"I have all the hold over you I need to," he says angrily, and is only brought back to himself by the sight of Rose staring at the crystal ball.

"Do it," he says shortly. "Now."

"Sit," Madame de Lancie says, pointing to a folding chair. Rose sits down, looking back at the Doctor. He smiles at her in reassurance.

The fortune teller is regarding the Doctor as though she's seeing him for the first time. "Her memories of you are gone, you said?"

"Yes," he says shortly.

"How is it that you remember her, then?"

"I don't know. I just do."

"Everyone else has forgotten him," Rose puts in. "So he says, anyway."

"Let's not go through all that again," he mutters.

"Interesting," Madame de Lancie murmurs. "Everyone should have been affected."

"Yes, well, it was me they were all busy forgetting, wasn't it? Clearly I got to keep my memory of myself. Thanks for that, by the way."

"It shouldn't work that way. You should not remember her." Madame de Lancie looks from the Doctor to Rose.

"Well, I do, and if you'd hurry up and make her remember me, we can be on our way." The Doctor feels odd ripples around him, tiny time streams running to and fro. Something is off, and he wants to be gone.

"I will try."

"I do remember you," Rose says now, suddenly. "You were here when we were canvassing the area. We had a...an accident site near here."

"You were in deep pain. I sensed it. I asked you in."

"Why?"

"I needed the energy your pain was emitting."

"Why was I in pain?" Rose asks.

"Why do you need that energy?" the Doctor demands.

"So many questions," she croons. "Listen instead. Watch." She pulls the crystal ball over to the center of the table. Taking Rose's right hand in her left, she places them both on the crystal.

"Remember," she whispers, looking at Rose. "Remember what we said that day."

"No." Rose resists the pull of the woman's hand on hers.

"Rose, please," the Doctor says. "This is the only way to fix this."

"What if there's nothing to fix?"

"There is, I promise you."

"I can't."

Madame de Lancie holds tightly to her hand. "Look at the crystal," she orders. "Look and remember."

"I'm very sorry, but I'm not supposed to be here. I don't believe it after all."

"Then believe me," she is told. "You were here with me. Look."

Almost unwillingly, Rose looks into the crystal ball. The clear surface seems to surge with color, turning from a clear cast to a light shade of violet.

_The day is wet and overcast. Country roads are washed out and Mickey has forgotten his boots._

_"This is terrible!" he complains. "Look at all the mud."_

_Jake is well-equipped with boots, raincoat and hat. The very sight of him makes Mickey complain even more._

_"How're we supposed to find anything in this mess?"_

_"Take my umbrella," Jake offers, trying not to laugh._

_Mickey glares at him but snatches the umbrella. It's no longer raining but he opens it up anyway, slogging through the mud in his new shoes._

_"This is why I stay in London," he says to them. "Pavement don't let mud ooze on through."_

_"It is truly disgusting and should be stopped," Jake agrees solemnly._

_"Something over here!" Rose calls out. "It's buried in mud. We'll need a shovel or something." She crouches down below it, getting mud on the hem of her coat. She's wearing a hat, and it's kept most of the rain off her face._

_Jake shakes his head and brandishes his mobile phone. "Stuck in some mud," he says, referring to the the field team who's supposed to be there with the heavier equipment. "We're on our own."_

_An hour later the object is removed, cleaned off in some puddles, and catalogued. Lacking a proper camera, Rose takes a picture with her phone. It appears to be an alien timekeeping device._

_"Good thing we caught that," Mickey says. "World's a better place, now that that alien clock is locked up."_

_"Hope they don't oversleep on their spaceship tomorrow morning," Jake says with a grin._

_Rose takes off her hat and shakes out her hair. "That's me," she says humorously. "Defender of the Earth."_

_Mickey turns back to her on the way to the car. "What's that?"_

_She shakes her head. "Nothing."_

_As Jake and Mickey load up the alien clock and the equipment they brought with them, she stands in the road and looks around._

_It's a small town, and the main street is lined with little shops. It is so entirely an English town, and so utterly unlike an alien town, that she smiles. Funny how after her adventures normal places seem the most exotic to her._

_Thinking of adventures and aliens makes her think of the Doctor. Many things do, even after all this time. That's something she's been trying NOT to do lately. She's trying so hard to move on, to live out the one adventure that he can never have and make it worthy of him._

_Trouble is, she doesn't care enough to do it. Something died in her that day on Bad Wolf Bay, and all the pretending in the world can't fix that. Even now she is looking up at the sky, searching for a flying blue box._

_She swallows hard and clears her throat to keep from crying. She will not cry, she tells herself sternly. No more tears._

_Mickey swears. "Car's stuck!"_

_"We'll have to wait for the others," Jake says._

_"By that time this mud'll be as hard as cement on my shoes!"_

_"I'm gonna walk down to the town," Rose calls to them. "Have a look around. Won't be gone long."_

_"Keep an eye out," Jake responds. Mickey is too busy trying to clean his new leather loafers to answer._

_Rose gets as far as the main street before her tears start. Right there in the street, in front of everyone who can look out their windows, she's crying like a fool. She's wiping her face when a woman appears before her, startling Rose so much that the tears stop abruptly._

_She's dressed in black but for an array of bright silk scarves. She's very pale and oddly ageless, with masses of dark hair swept up in an intricate knot at the back of her head. Gold necklaces and bangles are the only other bright spot about her._

_"You look sad," she tells Rose in a lightly accented voice. "Come and have some tea."_

_Rose was not born yesterday. Even if she'd never travelled through time and space, she was raised by Jackie Tyler. Jackie would never permit a daughter of hers to be so taken in._

_"No thanks," Rose says._

_"The grief is heavy in your heart. Come."_

_Rose forgets all about her mother as the woman takes her arm and escorts her into a small shop._

_"I am Madame de Lancie."_

_"You're a fortune teller?" Rose looks around the shop. Signs advertise services like tarot cards, tea leaf readings, and crystal ball interpretations._

_"Of sorts. Shall I read your future for you?"_

_Rose smiles ruefully. "My past was more exciting than any future I might have."_

_She lets herself be seated at the table anyway, in a small room behind the main store. She's beginning to enjoy yourself. This is the kind of thing she hasn't done since she was with the Doctor._

_It's surely a coincidence, but as she thinks of the Doctor and feels the old pull of longing and grief, Madame de Lancie looks up from her teapot._

_"So. Something is bothering you. Someone has hurt you."_

_"He hasn't hurt me," Rose denies quickly. "We...we were split up. I can't get back to him. I'm trapped where I am."_

_"You must be very unhappy."_

_"Well, no. No. It's just..different here."_

_"You're happy being without him?"_

_"No. I'm gonna find him! It's just taking longer than I thought."_

_"Of course. But what if you don't find him?"_

_"I will."_

_"But if not? What happens then? WIll you pine away for him forever?"_

_"No."_

_"Then what are you doing?"_

_"What do you mean? I'm...I'm living. Waiting."_

_"You can waste your life away by waiting for something that will never come. What if you could forget him and begin anew?"_

_"Excuse me?" Rose should have realized that a fortune teller is probably not the most mentally stable person she could have chosen to have afternoon tea with._

_Madame de Lancie smiles at her. "Wouldn't you like to forget?"_

_"No. No, I won't ever forget him. I'm going to go back."_

_"You will never find him again."_

_"I won't ever give up. I won't ever forget."_

_But even as she says the words Rose thinks back to her life so far on this place. Pain and hurt and just trying to get through each day. The painful disappointment every time she sees a tall man with brown hair, every time she sees a brown suit. She thinks of Jackie and Pete's attempts to make her have a normal life. She thinks of Gareth in Accounting, smiling at her and asking if she'd like to go out one evening._

_"All you want is a normal life," the woman croons to her. "A man, perhaps. A home. Love and happiness. You won't get that waiting for a ghost who won't come back."_

_"He's not a ghost! He's not dead! He's just...gone."_

_"He's gone and he can't come back. Think of the pain and misery you're feeling, child. Wouldn't it be better to be done with that?"_

_Rose swallows hard, thinks again of Gareth. "What would you do?" She is not naive - she's seen many things on her travels. Nothing comes for free. Everything has a price._

_"I can make you forget. I'll take your pain away and let you live your life."_

_"I can't." Rose shakes her head and starts to stand up. A hand on her arm stops her and forces her to sit back down._

_"I will make you forget." The woman looks deep into Rose's eyes, and the image of Gareth rises up again._

_Rose licks her lips and accepts what she's been refusing to admit. "He's not coming back for me."_

_"No."_

_"He said he can't."_

_"Do you believe him?"_

_"Yes. No! He can do so much, so many extraordinary things...he said he couldn't."_

_"So you will never see him again."_

_The stark truth comes to Rose for the first time since Bad Wolf Bay. The Doctor is lost to her._

_"All right," she whispers. "I can't do this anymore. Help me to forget him."_

_Madame de Lancie smiles. "I will." She reaches for the crystal ball and as she moves Rose's resolve weakens. So what if she will never see him again? She would not give up her memories of him for the world._

_"No," Rose says abruptly. "No! I won't forget. I'm sorry." Her momentary lapse over, she pushes back her chair to stand up._

_"Too late, I'm afraid." The woman waves her hand over the crystal ball. It flares bright blue._

_"Your pain is gone. Open your eyes and start again."_

Rose jerks her hands away from the crystal ball, crying out in pain. Madame de Lance grabs her hands back. She looks into Rose's eyes, struck.

"What are you?" she whispers in fear and awe. "What are you?"

Rose stares at her, speechless. She is herself. Taking her hands back, she sees golden light arc between herself and the fortune teller. A surge seems to go through her mind, and she covers her eyes with her hands.

"No!"

"Rose!" The Doctor leaps for her, kneels beside her chair and examines her face.

"It's happened," Madame de Lancie's voice says from somewhere behind them.

"Is she better?"

Memories wash over Rose, swamping her.

_"Run for your life!"_

_"I want yousafe. My Doctor."_

_"I love you."_

_"How do I forget him?"_

_"Forever."_

_"Who's gonna hold his hand now?"_

_"Forever."_

_"How long are you gonna stay with me?"_

_"Lots of planets have a North."_

_"There's me."_

_"Forever."_

_"You think you're so impressive."_

_"I made my choice a long time ago, and I'm never gonna leave you."_

_"Forever."_

_"I love you."_

_"Is that what you're going to do to me?"_

_"No. Not to you."_

_"You don't just let things happen. You take a stand. You say no."_

_"Forever."_

_"Everything must come to dust."_

_"I love you."_

She cries out, wanting it to stop.

"Rose! Rose!" The Doctor forces her face up. "Look at me!"

"Doctor?" She stares at him wordlessly.

"Rose?"

"I remember! I remember everything!" Rose stops and looks at him, really looks at him. "You came back."

He nods. "I came back."

She laughs suddenly. "You came back!"

He laughs, too. "I did! I came back!"

They're giggling like fools when Madame de Lancie suddenly stands up, knocking the table aside. "Go!" she snaps. "Don't pay for my kindness to you!"

"Pay?" Rose asks her, but it's too late. The crystal ball falls to the floor. Rose covers her eyes with her arm and sparks begin to fly.

"Go!"

"What is that?" she hears the Doctor shout out. The the floor gives way and they are falling. Madame de Lancie's cries follow them down.

* * *

Rose comes back to consciousness on a floor. A cold, wet floor. Her hand is lying in a puddle of something slimy. With an exclamation of disgust, she pushes herself up and looks around, wiping her hand on her jeans.

She's in a cold, wet, dark room. Not exactly dark - it's got a dim red glow.

"Hello?" she calls out tentatively. "Is someone there?"

"Rose?"

Turning her head she spots the Doctor just a few feet away.

"Doctor? Are you all right?"

A groan is his answer, and Rose crawls over to him. "What happened?"

"I don't quite know at the moment." He's lying on the floor, a puddle of something wet beneath him. As he levers himself up to a sitting position, his hands come in contact with the wet stuff.

"Oh, that's disgusting!"

"Might just be water."

"That's hardly ever the case." He wipes his hands on his coat and looks around. "Well. A dungeon. How original."

"We've been in worse spots before," she tells him, still kneeling beside him.

He turns to look at her, her face lit by the red light. "We have," he agrees slowly. "I remember lots of places like this, unfortunately. Do you?"

She smiles, a happy smile totally at odds with their current location. "I remember everything. I remember you."

"Really? Do you? Are you sure?" He wants so badly to believe her, but he's afraid to take that last step towards it.

She's still smiling, though there are tears in her eyes now. "You grabbed my hand and told me to run and we never stopped running. Sometimes we hopped. I looked into the heart of the TARDIS to save your life, and I'm so sorry I couldn't hold on to that lever."

"Rose." He reaches for her and pulls her against his chest, hugging her so tightly that she's sure to have sore ribs in the morning.

"You came back," she is saying into his chest. "You came back for me."

"Of course I came back for you! Sod the laws of the universe! I missed you."

"I missed you, too! So much! It was lonely and miserable and it wasn't home and no one was you. How could you just fade away like that?" she demands of him. "You were supposed to take me with you!"

He frames her face with his hands, hoping they're clean enough to touch her pretty skin. "I did all that I could that day. I'm so sorry. But as soon as I could I started trying to get back to you. I didn't care what might happen."

The tears are falling from her eyes as she nods. "Don't go away again, okay?"

"Oh, Rose. Not without you. I'm never leaving you again." The Doctor throws off all the rules of the universe, other Time Lord rules that he's imposed upon himself, and shifts closer to her. Rose scoots in to him, wraps her hands around his arms.

"Doctor," she whispers.

"Rose," he whispers back, mere centimeters away from her mouth. "Who is Gareth?"

"No one," she assures him. "No one at all."

"Good. That's very, very good." He's about to do what he never dared to do before, and it feels very, very good. He's done and finished with being the conscience of the universe, with being the lonely god.

Just as he's about to brush her lips with his own the room floods with a white light. They blink at the shock of it, coming away from each other to look around.

"Come," a voice says.

"Excuse me?" the Doctor answers.

"Come," the voice says again, and a door opens in the wall.

Glancing at each other, they get to their feet, the Doctor supporting Rose by the waist.

"Rose," he says. "You know how Madame de Lancie changed events and time and memories?"

"Yeah?"

"I don't think she was doing it by herself."


	6. Chapter 6

**Cause I followed my star and that's what you are**

"You should have left well enough alone," the voice says. "Come along."

They move to the doorway. The hall is empty.

"What?" Rose looks to the hallway, trying hard to make out something in the darkness. "What did you say?"

"Come." Out of the shadows appears Madame de Lancie.

The Doctor steps forward. "You! What have you done? Who are you helping?"

She looks tired and haggard, much different from the last time they saw her. "You are to come this way," she says in a voice devoid of all expression.

Rose and the Doctor exchange a worried look.

"What's happened?" Rose asks her. "Are you all right?"

"This way."

They leave the halls of the dungeon and climb narrow steps that lead into a small, dark room.

"Where are we?" Rose whispers to the Doctor.

"Don't know," he whispers back. "Some kind of house?"

"How did we get here?" she persists. She remembers falling, and waking up, but nothing in between.

The fortune teller waves her hand at a corner of the room. Rose turns in that direction, wondering if they're supposed to sit, stand or kneel. Madame de Lancie opens up the curtains that are hanging at the room's only window. Shadows in the corner turn into a large humanoid figure.

Rose and the Doctor make identical sounds of revulsion. The figure is dark gray, its skin thick and scaly. Eyes of yellow are the only light in its face. Small horns sprout from the top of its head.

"Who are you?" the Doctor asks in fascination. Rose is torn between amusement and the urge to slap him back to the matter at hand. Clearly this monster is to be dreaded, feared and defeated, not admired.

"My master," Madame de Lancie murmurs.

"Does it talk?" the Doctor asks, eyes still fixed on the creature.

"I speak." The voice is clear in the room, but nothing resembling a mouth has moved correspondingly on the creature's face.

"How do you do that?" Rose asks it.

"It is how I communicate."

"Yeah, but how-"

"Rose, it's enough that he is talking to us," the Doctor interrupts her, "and not doing anything else to us. What do you want with us?"

"My servant should not have allowed your memories to be restored."

"I asked her to do it," the Doctor says.

"I took those memories in the first place," the alien counters. "To have them taken back was unpleasant."

"Well, how do you suppose my friend felt?"

"She knew nothing until you came to show her what was lost," the alien snaps. "You are the reason I suffer now."

"Oh. Are you suffering?" the Doctor asks interestedly. "Because as far as I can see, you're sitting pretty comfortably."

The creature growls. Madame de Lancie steps away.

"Could you possibly explain, sometime today, what we're doing here?" Rose asks tartly. "And why you wanted my memories in the first place?"

The creature's eyes focus on her, and a lesser woman than Rose would have backed away. Rose takes a step back, moving closer to the Doctor, just in case. She bumps into him and he slips his arm around her waist.

"Rose Tyler."

"That's, that's me. How do you know that?"

"He took your memories," the Doctor tells her. "Somehow he used Madame de Lancie and siphoned them off."

"Is that true?" Rose demands of Madame de Lancie. "Is that why you offered to help me that day?"

"We were waiting for one like you," Madame de Lancie admits weakly. "One who was in pain."

"But what for?" Rose asks.

"It's how he feeds," the Doctor says in a voice of anger and disgust. "Isn't it? Somehow it uses energy from thoughts, and it needed Madame de Lancie to do it. Where are your kind from? I don't recognize you. It must be unique to this universe," he says in an aside to Rose.

The creature gives what might be a laugh. "You do not feel human. You are certainly brighter than a human. Perhaps that is why I will keep you alive longer than the girl."

Rose really does not care where this creature came from. "What do you want with us?"

"What is your name?" the Doctor asks again.

"My people are the Shadows. I arrived in this world some time ago. I landed near a village. My ship was damaged. I came upon this one," gesturing to Madame de Lancie, "and sensed her abilities."

"Her psychic abilities?"

"Low, for some species. Very high, for the ones living on this planet. I needed her to identify humans in pain. I feed off the energy that pain causes. I needed someone to find them for me. I have no substance." It holds up an arm that does, indeed, look very much like a shadow.

"Not physical pain," Rose says. "You don't cause physical pain. You want someone sad or upset or afraid."

"Correct."

"But why my memories?" she asks. "Why were they so important?"

"They caused you pain and sadness. By taking them from you I fed on those emotions. I replaced the blank space with forgetfulness."

"Fine, but they were mine, yeah? How did you erase all memory of the Doctor from my friends?"

"They altered the timelines somehow," the Doctor says. "Didn't you? Changing what happened meant changing the timeline of events."

Rose is horrified by this implication. "Everything that happened, you changed? The Cybermen and the attacks and how I came to this world...you changed it all!"

The Doctor can't help but admire this. "You created entirely new memories for a group of people. Amazing. But they need to be restored."

"They have already had those memories returned," the alien growls. "Now we must hunt for new prey."

"Is that what you do?" Rose demands of Madame de Lancie. "He tells you what to do and you do it?"

"For two months we worked together. Then my ship's site was discovered and you were called in."

"What, in the village? All we found was a clock."

"An oversight on my part. My ship is well-hidden but the timing device was lost. You found it. I your pain and knew that it would be good for us. She came to find you."

"I only went walking because the car was stuck in the mud," Rose says.

"Had you not, we would have come for you," Madame de Lancie says in a tired voice. "I am sorry."

"Why did you let him do that?" Rose asks.

"Be still!" The creature raises a hand and Madame de Lancie gasps for breath, her hand at her throat.

"What are you doing to her?" Rose cries. "Let her go!"

The Doctor holds her back before she can attack the alien herself.

"I'm using what I can on this world to sustain myself."

"But you're hurting her!"

"That is of no consequence. My biological imperative is to survive at all costs."

The Doctor keeps Rose back with an effort. "What do you need her for, anyway? Let her go."

"He amplified my abilities," Madame de Lancie whispers. "Offered to make them stronger, bring in more business. He joined his mind with mine to make it happen."

He can't help feeling appalled. "And you let him? An alien creature?"

"It worked well at first."

"When your friend came I saw a chance to take what I needed for a longer length of nourishment. It worked quite well. But now the restoration of her memories has drawn the energy back from me. So I draw it from this human."

"Let her go," the Doctor says. "Release your hold on her and I will help you."

"Help me? How?"

"We can take you back to you home. "

"I have no wish for that. There are plenty on this planet who are in pain."

Rose is near tears. This women did not set out to harm her on purpose, and she can't bear to see her suffer.

"Let her go!" Madame de Lancie still struggles for breath, and she has sunk to the floor.

"Your people could not find me," the alien hisses. "You could not detect what had happened to your minds. You were not missing the energy I took from you. There is no harm in that."

"There's harm in harming a person!" Rose cries.

"You need to go," the Doctor says. "Let go of this woman and return to your planet."

"I don't think so."

The Doctor pulls out his sonic screwdriver, thumbs it to the setting he needs, all the time keeping his attention on the alien, and therefore its attention off what he's doing.

"One last chance," he says. "You can still walk away from this."

"I have no intention of doing so. I will take your energy until you are but husks. And then we will go hunting for more."

Madame de Lancie whimpers in pain and fear.

The Doctor raises the sonic and takes aim. The alien howls and collapses.

"You wouldn't think a shadow-like substance would be affected by something like a sonic screwdriver," the Doctor tells the alien pleasantly. "But it's actually quite effective."

Rose doesn't spare it a glance as she runs to Madame de Lancie.

"Are you all right?" she asks breathlessly, holding up the woman's head "Madame de Lancie?"

She manages a weak smile. "My name is Janet."

"Janet. Stay with me, Janet. Stay awake."

"I'll be all right," she whispers, just before passing out.

* * *

They take Janet back to her home. She is as healthy as the Doctor can ascertain, with no lasting effects from the psychic raiding.

"Just don't go availing yourself of more aliens," he tells her firmly.

She smiles. "No, I will not. Thank you for your help. I'm sorry this has to affect you."

"It's okay," Rose assures her. "It worked out in the end."

They've helped her lay down on her couch. Rose fixed her a cup of tea from her kitchen and Janet is drinking it gratefully. The Doctor goes away to take sonic readings of the house to ensure that no negative psychic effects remain.

"It may have worked out for you, but the next person we chose may not have been so lucky. I can't imagine having that done to me."

"Well, it's okay now," Rose says. "We're good to go."

"Almost." Janet sits up quickly, setting her cup down. "Rose."

"Yeah?"

She catches Rose's hands in hers, and Rose is uncomfortably reminded of the last time they sat posed like this.

"I was drawn to you because of something inside you," Janet whispers, even though the Doctor is several rooms and one floor away. Rose can hear him clattering around, opening doors and drawers.

"Inside me?" Rose shakes her head, not understanding.

"We read something within you. Something small and bright and hot. It could have destroyed us, but instead you let us take your memories."

"I didn't let you do anything! You took them from me. You and that alien crystal ball."

"The alien is gone now. It doesn't control me. But the time it spent inside my mind strengthened my own abilities. I can see much more than before, Rose."

"And?" Rose presses.

"Be careful," Janet whispers to her as the Doctor comes back to the room. "Not all fire will burn you, but it has a price."

Rose stares at her, not understanding.

* * *

They take the still unconscious alien back to his planet, where they dump him on the consulate's doorstep with a strict warning to keep him away from Earth. The aliens, stunned by a visit from a human, agree with almost no opposition.

"Guess the aliens in this universe haven't communicated with Earth yet," Rose says as they're on their way home in the TARDIS.

"Guess not," the Doctor agrees cheerfully. "Hope we haven't started a trend. Or altered history too much. That would be unfortunate."

"Well, he started it."

He lands them on the Tylers' lawn. Checking the computer monitor, he doesn't see signs that the Tylers have gone all out to defend themselves from an alien attack. He does not mind admitting to himself that the notion of facing both of Rose's parents makes him hesitate to leave the safety of his ship.

Rose stands beside him at the console. "Will they remember you?" she asks. "My parents and Mickey and Jake?"

"Your memories were restored and returned. I felt the time shift back to the moment she changed your thoughts and then shift back to now. A complicated procedure. The Shadow must have used enormous resources to control and manipulate her mind to the extent that she could then manipulate yours. And for Madame de Lancie to manipulate reality back to the moment she took those memories in the first place must have required-" He catches the look Rose is giving him and clears his throat.

"They should."

"Come on." She takes his hand and they walk out of the TARDIS and to the front door. Rose thinks it's a good thing that no security teams are swarming over them right now.

He hangs back at the steps.

"Come on." She tugs on his arm. "They'll be fine."

Jackie flings open the door, looking worn and haggard. "Rose!"

"I'm all right, Mum."

Jackie hugs her tightly. "It wasn't a dream," she says, looking at the Doctor over Rose's shoulder. "You're here. You came back."

He nods.

There is nothing more for him to say. From the moment Jackie got her memory back, she's known what's going to happen next. He sees it in her eyes, her understanding and acceptance. He feels terrible for being the one to cause that look on her face, but he's going to do it just the same.

* * *

Mickey and Jake are called to the mansion, and the Doctor runs brief readings on them all. Pete and Jackie show no effect from what happened.

"It's good to see you again," Mickey tells the Doctor.

He grins. "You too. You enjoying this place?"

"Of course. Got work, friends." Mickey shrugs. "Never had a chance with her once you walked in," he admits. "I knew that all along, but you can't blame a man for trying."

"Er, no." The Doctor doesn't quite know what to say to that. "Mickey..."

"She wants to go back with you. Take her. I know Jackie's not too keen about it, but it's what Rose needs."

"The breach is still open, but we need to move quickly. If you want...there's plenty of room in the TARDIS."

"Travel around again, you, me and Rose?"

The Doctor shifts uncomfortably. "If you want. Or I could just take you back home."

Mickey's expression turns dark. "What's it like now?"

"London is rebuilding. But it's still...the estate - well, there's not much left."

"Yeah, figured as much. Thanks, Doctor, but I'll stay here. My gran's still here and I'm taking care of her. Reckon I'll do okay."

"All right, then." An awkward silence ensues, and the Doctor breaks it when he recalls something.

"Mickey, this Gareth fellow?"

'Yeah?"

"He's an, a co-worker?"

"Accountant," Jake puts in.

"And he and Rose were dating?" The Doctor is trying hard to appear casual, but the two men see right through him. Jake has a faint smirk on his face.

"They were dating for a while," Jake acknowledges. "I think the lack of memory had a part in that. We've already had a talk with him."

"Oh, good then. That's, wait, you had a talk with him?"

"We had to explain what was wrong with Rose," Mickey says. "Obviously, since she'd been acting all loopy and giggly and just not herself. He knew it - she'd paid him no attention before, and then it was all maybe this will work out and he's my boyfriend, isn't this great?"

"He got over it," Jake assures him. "He knew Rose was missing somebody. We just told him you'd come back and Rose was staying with you."

The Doctor is rather touched by this gesture of affection towards Rose. "Well. Thanks. It wasn't his fault this all happened."

"That's what friends are for," they remind him.

* * *

Memories are returned to normal, with no foreign residue left behind. A happy little reunion ensues, and Rose can appreciate how much the Doctor has missed her if he's willing to hang around her parents' home instead of leaving in the TARDIS immediately.

They both know there's no coming back here, and he's letting her have one last evening with her family. Letting Jackie have her daughter for one more night.

Rose is reluctant to bring it up. They've had a nice time so far. He's allowed himself to be pulled into the mansion for the evening with Pete and Jackie. The main fact of life that is hanging over their heads is still there, but no one says a word about it. One final night of normality.

Rose can remember another strange kind of prophecy. Two, actually. The werewolf told her that she burnt like the sun. The beast said that she would die in battle. She remembers bright golden light and the destruction of the Dalek emperor. She didn't lose her life in battle, but the Rose Tyler who lived on her world died.

"Not all fire will burn, but it has a price," she says now.

It's after dinner. Jackie and Pete are in the dining room,giving some directions to the staff. Rose and the Doctor are sitting in the parlor, waiting for them to come back so they can hurt Jackie some more.

The Doctor looks up from a gossip magazine that has Rose's picture on the cover.

"What?"

"Madame de Lancie said that not all fire will burn me."

He cocks his head in puzzlement. "It won't?"

"She's a psychic, Doctor. She sees things that we can't."

"The alien was amplifying that for her."

"And she kept that ability! I think she was reading my future."

"What, without tea leaves or tarot cards?"

"Doctor!" Rose says impatiently.

"Rose?"

"My memories are back," she says softly. "All of them, even the ones I tried to forget. I can't seem to put them all away again."

He looks concerned and sets the magazine aside. "That should fade in time. If not, we can-"

"Not the point. I'm fine. But everything's just, right there, right in front of me, all at once and all the time. I looked into the Time Vortex to save you. What if it changed me?"

"I took it out of you, Rose. Nothing remains." He takes her hands in his and holds them together against his chest, right below the knot in his tie. "You would have died if anything were left behind."

"I could see the TARDIS. I remembered it, even when I couldn't remember you."

"And you think it's because you have a new ability?"

He's deliberately avoiding the issue, Rose thinks. "Fine," she says shortly. "I'm being silly, am I?"

"Well, yes, you are, actually."

She glares at him.

He clears his throat. "I'll just go and check on the TARDIS. Are you..." He can't bring himself to say the words he wants to say. For a brief time, here on this world with her, he was able to act like someone not quite himself. Now the old patterns have come back and he is powerless to change now.

It might also be, of course, that he's in Jackie Tyler's house. He's still waiting for her to come down and slap him good.

"I'm coming with you," Rose says. "I'm going back with you."

"I won't say it's not what I want. But are you sure? Your parents, the baby..."

"They'll be fine without me. I'll say goodbye and pack up my stuff and it'll be like, like I was never here." The notion makes her tear up. He's smiling fondly at her. He knows exactly what she's choosing, and he knows it's not easy.

"I won't be able to bring you back," he says gently. "I don't know how I managed it this time."

"I know." But her tears are coming faster. "But...but we might be able to one day, yeah? By accident or something?"

He nods. "That's always possible."

"Okay, then." She wipes her face. "I'm coming with you. Don't try to change my mind."

"I won't."

* * *

Jackie is crying.

"Mum, please." Rose falters.

"I knew you were leaving with him," Jackie sniffs. "Soon as I remembered, I looked at Pete and I knew. But it's still hard to say goodbye to you."

"Ill be all right, Mum. He'll take care of me."

"Oh, Rose." Jackie hugs her tightly. "Promise me you'll be safe. Promise me!"

"I promise," Rose vows. "Promise you'll take care of little Alistair."

Jackie manages to laugh through her teas. "Dad's calling him Linus right now."

"Oh, that's awful."

"I know." Jackie lets out her breath and kisses her daughter one last time.

They're standing on the lawn, the TARDIS a few meters away. Pete and Mickey and Jake are ranged on the steps, watching. She's already said goodbye to them, and doesn't think she could do it again.

The Doctor comes out of the TARDIS and raises an arm to the men in greeting. They wave back.

Turning around, he squares his shoulders and faces Jackie Tyler. No one will ever call him a coward.

"Jackie."

"Take care of her," Jackie tells him with a mean look in her eye. "It's your job to do that now."

"I will," he promises. He lets her hug him because he knows pregnant women can be emotional. He neatly evades the kiss she tries to give him, though. A man's got to have his limits, even if he's not really a man.

"I love you," Rose says, hugging her mum tightly once more.

"I love you, too, Rose. Goodbye." Jackie is crying for herself. Rose is doing what she wants to do. Jackie will miss her so much, but if this is what she wants than she will let her do it.

What will happen to her human Rose, living with a nearly-immortal alien, is not something Jackie is going to think about right now.

Her bags are already in the TARDIS. With a last wave at everyone, Rose follows the Doctor inside.

Jackie stands on the lawn as the blue box fades away.

* * *

On the softly scented apple grass on New Earth, Rose and the Doctor lie on a blanket and admire the scenery of New New York.

She's wearing black trousers and a lime green sweater. He's still in his brown suit. Instead of a tie he's wearing her favorite dark blue shirt, unbuttoned at the throat over another blue shirt. They're comfortable enough with each other now that she lies curled up against his side, her head resting on his shoulder.

"What did you do?" Rose asks. "After I was gone?"

"Oh, lots of things." He lays back on the ground. "Went to the moon. Saved the world from the Daleks-"

"What, again?" she asks, appalled.

"Afraid so."

"For good?" she demands.

"Yes. Hopefully."

"What else?"

He thinks. "I went to the end of the universe."

"Really?" She rolls over onto her stomach and looks at him. "We were already there. We watched the Earth burn."

"That was the end of Earth," he reminds her. This was the end of the universe, the end of mankind."

Rose can barely conceive of such a thing. "What was it like?"

He pauses, thinking over what had happened. "It was...horrible. Worse than horrible." A year of captivity that never was, death and destruction and losses beyond his ability to bear them. Hurting his friends, watching them be hurt.

Rose senses there is more that he's not sharing. She will not push him right now. Someday he will tell her.

"Were you alone?" she asks instead.

He turns to look at her. "What?"

"You've had companions before me. Did you travel alone?"

"No. Not always. There was the woman. Called Martha. She was a doctor. She tagged along for a bit."

Rose tries not to feel jealous. She fails. "A doctor?"

"She was brilliant. Very smart and very brave. Just one problem."

"What?"

He smiles at her. "She wasn't you."

* * *

They walk around New New York, the Doctor pointing out things she'd missed the first time they were there.

"So you really brought her here? A place we'd been to together?"

He sighs. "I wanted to show her something spectacular."

"And you chose this? I mean, it's a nice place, but can you blame her for being annoyed?"

"A rational human would not have felt annoyed."

"You were on the rebound," she accuses him.

"Well, of course. I was missing you. I made it up to her. We went and met Shakespeare next."

"Shakespeare!" Rose says indignantly. "I never got to meet Shakespeare!"

"I would have taken you in time, Rose. I still will. But I had to make it up to Martha."

"She fancied you," Rose says suddenly, getting to the root rather quickly. "Didn't she? She did!" she says, seeing the look on his face. "Oh, Doctor, how could you?"

"I couldn't help it! I asked her to travel along for a while, not to have a, a romance or anything."

"Idiot."

"Oi!"

She giggles and rests her head on his arm. He slips his arm around her waist.

"How could I not miss you?" he asks. "I couldn't stop. I tried."

"I wanted to stop," Rose says. "I knew it was useless to miss you and hope and wait. But you came!"

"I did! I came back for you."

Their happy laughter fades, and Rose finally faces the question that was on Jackie's mind, the one that's on hers right now, that's been on her mind ever since they returned to their proper universe. They've been avoiding the entire issue, but now that she knows this is permanent, that their relationship is on another, different track than before, it needs to be said. He will not deal with it, she knows from long experience, so it's up to her.

"So, I'm human."

"Yes, I know," he says, looking down at her and grinning. "Pink and yellow and human. That's you."

She smiles at him. He's already evading the subject, poor thing. Maybe he just can't help it.

"I'm human. I'm gonna die. We don't have forever."

"Stop it."

"We need to face it," she insists.

"Rose." There are tears in his eyes, in his voice, and at long last she understands his words to her outside that chip shop, so long ago when they were hunting Krillitaines.

"But it's all right, Doctor. Don't you understand? I'm willing to take the risk. You came all this way to find me! If you hadn't I'd still be walking around, not remembering you."

"Will you stay with me?" he asks quietly.

"What were you going to say?" she asks. "That day on the beach - the worst day of my life. What were you going to say?"

He looks down at her, his expression open. "Rose Tyler," he says tenderly, "I love you."

Her breath leaves her lungs in a rush.

"I love you," he repeats, surprised. "Why are you crying?"

She shakes her head. "Sorry. It's stupid. But it was just so hard, losing you. And now I've got you back."

"You've got me back," he agrees.

She wipes her eyes. "Forever?" she asks tentatively.

"Oh, no, not forever," he assures her. "That's not long enough."

_Once upon a time there was a woman named Rose who loved a man with no name but the one he gave himself. He took her away from home in his magical machine and showed her the whole of time and space. _

_She promised him forever, the only forever that she had. They thought it would have to be enough. They were happy with what they had._

_But Bad Wolf has other plans for Rose, other plans for her forevers._

_The song remains._

to be continued..._._


End file.
